The Absence Of Explanation | Rev. Jason Weir
by Jason Weir
First Apostolic Church of Maryville (Maryville, TN)
Kind: sermon
Scripture: Job 1:1-12, Job 1:13-22, Daniel 3:26, Acts 16:16-17, Job 13:15

Source: https://acts238.life/repository/sermons/jason-weir--the-absence-of-explanation
Published by Acts 2:38 Life from the sermon transcript on that page.
Free to copy and share with attribution.

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praise God we are so honored to be here tonight amen and I love the Lord I love what I feel in this place and I love it when God confirms his word for me amen and we're so blessed to be here amen if you reach for your Bibles tonight I give great honor this is probably one of the highest honors of my Ministry to be allowed to fill this platform amen my father passed away almost 10 years ago and brother Carpenter became my pastor at that point and uh when we stopped pastoring and began to evangelize it just made sense to live in maraville amen and so we're so blessed to be here as a matter of fact one year ago today or this Sunday was our first Sunday of me as members of First Apostolic olic church amen and I I say that one of the greatest things we ever done and I know you get to see my family much more than I so the Lord has commissioned me tonight to just kind of preach my testimony if that's okay amen and I I give such high honor to Pastor uh I spoke with him today and he wanted me to convey his love to you amen and let you know that they'll be back and ready for some Revival church on Wednesday night amen and he's going to come back and clean up every mess that I made amen and I'm so blessed Amen to to get the chance to make those messes amen we had a great time I got to be with Pastor or this afternoon and God is doing great things in Madisonville amen am amen what an awesome guy amen and brother John Stone was at severville and brother Purdue was at Cleveland so the the fingers of this Church's Ministry have still reached out today in the absence of our pastor amen but we are so honored to be here amen and and I pray that you'll just help me from the start will you do that if I'm a bad preacher you may never have to hear me again and if I'm a good preacher well we'll put a plug in with pastor and maybe I'll get invited back amen but such an honor such an honor Job chapter 1 amen what an awesome message I I I wish I could have just done Wednesday night because following Brother white and brother John Stone is not an easy task amen they give us tremendous words from the Lord amen and the the ministry of this platform is hard to follow amen but I give such great honor I don't say this just as cliche but this church is setting the standard for what churches are supposed to be in the Apostolic Church in this day and age amen I get to travel all over this country preaching the gospel and this is the this we set the bar at First Apostolic amen and I'm thankful to be a part of that amen amen Job 1 and one there was a man in the land of us whose name was job that man was perfect and upright one that feared God and assu Evil and there were born unto him seven sons and three daughters his substance also was 7,000 sheep 3,000 camels 500 yoke of oxen 500 she asses and a very great household so that this man was the greatest of all of the men of the East and his sons went and feasted in their houses everyone his day and sent and called for their three sisters to eat and drink with them and it was so when the days of their feasting were gone about that job sent and Sanctified them and Rose up early in the morning and offered burnt offerings according to the number of them all for job said it may be that my sons have sinned and cursed God in their hearts thus did job continually now there was a day when the sons of God came to present themselves before the Lord and Satan came also among them and the Lord said unto Satan whence comest thou Satan answered the Lord and said from going to and fro in the earth and from walking up and down in it and the Lord said unto Satan without any prodding Satan never asked him for a suggestion the Lord said unto Satan hast thou considered my servant job that there is none Like Him in all the earth a perfect and upright man one that feareth God and asseth Evil then Satan answered the Lord and said doth job fear God for not hast Thou made a hedge about him and about his house and all that he ha on every side thou has blessed The Works of his hands and his substance is increased in the land but put forth thine hand now and touch all that he hath and he will curse thee to thy face and the Lord said unto Satan behold all that he hath is in thy power only upon himself put not forth thine hand so Satan went from the presence of the Lord if the Lord will help me tonight I feel the the con confirmation of his Spirit to preach to this congregation in the absence of explanation in the absence of explanation would you help me pray tonight Heavenly Father we need you tonight I ask you for strength in my my spirit my mind and my body give me Clarity of thought let me speak only what you have ordained and anointed for this hour I pray God that we would hear what heaven is speaking unto us tonight rescue a soul tonight father I ask for your spirit to reach into the portals of time and bring someone God out of the place of battle that they have walked through in the mighty name of Jesus in the mighty name of Jesus would you give the Lord Praise as you're seated today Hallelujah I contined reading in this chapter and and you don't have to follow along but I'm going to Screen through here because I see how God with without any prodding and and and there was no reasoning he just out of nowhere says have you have you thought about going and causing trouble for job if you thought about going down there and messing with his kids and messing with his family and and with his finances and have you just have you thought about going down there and and I have to think that in this conversation that somewhere the sainton began to to say wait a minute why would I mess with job you you you you've got a fence built around him and then God says job is such a good Christian he's he's so faithful to me then I'm going to take the fence down and let you just attack him now now we live in a world that that that that mindset that says that uh if bad things are happening to you you must not be doing something right but I've come to tell you some storms happen because you are doing something right some battles happen because you are in the perfect will of God some things some enemies rise up against you because they are afraid of what you are going to do in the kingdom of God oh yes hallelujah amen and and verse 13 said and there was a day when his sons and his daughters were eating and drinking wine in their eldest brother's house and there came a messenger unto job and said The Oxen were plowing and the asses feeding behind them and the savans fell upon them and took them away yeah if they slain the servant with the edge of the sword and I only am escaped alone to tell thee while he was yet speaking there came another servant and said the fire of God is fallen from Heaven hath burned up the sheep and the servants and consumed them and I only am alone escaped to tell thee while he was yet speaking there came also another and said the Chalan made out with three bands fell upon the camels and have carried them away yay and slain the the servants with the edge of the sword and I only am alone escape to tell thee it kind of to me sounds like life sometimes when you get in a battle and the enemy continues to put one struggle and one battle upon top of another I can see job what in the world is going on you know I if if your house is like the Wearhouse if the if the washer breaks down so does the dryer and when you get them fixed the dishwasher starts acting up I I had to in one year I put like nine tires on my car I finally told the tire place please quit putting magnets in my tires because they're finding every nail that's on the roads of marville Tennessee please quit doing it amen and it just seems like it's battle up on top of battle storm up on top of storm and I can imagine job I don't think job got up and testified and said well the devil's been after me all week glory to God or glory to his name I don't think so I see job thinking my Lord what's going on then and while he's yet speaking there came another servant and said look you got to know something said uh there was a great wind that blew through and then and it came out of the Wilderness and it smoked the four corners of the house said I hate to tell you job but it fell on the young men and they're all dead said I'm the only one that got out of their life and while he's yet speaking here comes another one behold said there's there's a battle then the Bible says that job arose I didn't do that but it was good timing job got up with authority now oh job arose I think job said I've had enough that's enough he got up and the Bible said he rent his mantel he shaved his head and he fell upon the ground and worshiped now look it's easy to worship when nothing's broke down nothing's going wrong there's no battles in your health there's no battles in your family there's no battles in your emotions it's easy to come in and give God praise but job taught us what true worship is can you worship when the enemy has heaped battle up on top of battle and you don't even know the explanation you don't even know where it's coming from he said naked came I out of my mother's womb and naked shall I return thither the lord gave and the Lord hath taken away blessed be the name of the Lord in all this job sinned not nor charged God foolishly God help me today to never blame God for the storms that I have to go through God help me today to keep my spirit right before the Lord oh God there's so much in this text that I want you to see but I don't have time to bring it all out but when Satan began to talk to the Lord I want you to notice he said hast thou considered my servant job many many people today in our world and even in the church world would not respond real well to being called a servant I don't know how everything works my my family's on some of the whatever I don't know I'm usually gone I don't know how all the systems work on singing and cleaning and doing all this I don't know about that but I do know this we're in a day where a lot of folks are okay with being a servant as long as they're going to be seen but don't call me a servant any other time if I don't get the credit for it then don't call me a servant I'm my own person I'm nobody's servant I'm My Own man I'm own woman what I got I've got worked hard for nobody's going to tell me how to do anything and that it sounds exactly like what it would be if you began to talk to people don't call me a servant I am my own person but Jesus didn't say have you thought about the rich man job he didn't say have you thought about the man that's got all kind of blessings and he's got the most beautiful daughters and he's blessed he's the he's the greatest in all of the East he didn't say that he said have you considered my servant job can I tell you ladies and gentlemen some things happen in your life because you are a servant if you'll help me tonight we're going to go somewhere you see to be a servant you have to serve somebody you've got to be at their call well when they want you to do something you do it without asking you don't get to ask any questions it doesn't matter how you feel at the moment it doesn't matter if it's your day off you simply as a servant have to do what the master asked of you can I tell you something folks this the master never had to describe or explain to the servant why he was doing something and God does not owe us an explanation for some of the battles that he makes us walk through things weren't much different back in job's day Daniel 3 and 26 said then Nebuchadnezzar came near to the mouth of the burning fiery furnace and he spake Shadrach mesach and Abednego ye Servants of the most high God they weren't being thrown into the fire just because they said we're not going to Bow they were being put in the fire because Nebuchadnezzar knew these men know who Jesus is they are Servants of the most high God let me tell you something folks if you're in a battle tonight let me just teach you something out of Shadrach Meshach and abedo Nebuchadnezzar called his strongest men to throw them into the fire he got his strongest men to do the work and the Bible said that they died at the doorway of the Furnace the fact that the Hebrew boys went into the fire was a guaranteed proof they were coming out of the fire the fact that you're in a battle tonight gives me confidence to tell you you're coming out of the battle you're coming out of the storm you're coming out of the circumstance you just keep being a servant acts 16:16 said and it came to pass last as we went to prayer a certain damsel possessed with a spirit of divination met us brought her Masters much gained by Soo saying then the same followed Paul and US crying these men are Servants of the most high God I'm going tell you something I declare to you tonight whether you want to be called it or not everybody is going to serve something everybody is going to serve something some will serve the god of lust some will serve the god of money some will serve the god of a promotion some will serve the god of the things of this world but I'm going to tell you something if you're going to call me a servant I don't want it to just be somebody I don't want it to just be anybody I don't want it to just be everybody but I'm going to be a servant of the most high God let him find me doing something for the kingdom let him find me working for the cause of Calvary servant is not privy to the plans of the master the master doesn't have to answer to the servant the master doesn't have to share his plans with the servant Bible teaches us that job's friends come in and they said job man we about to give up and we're not even the ones sick said you know I Devil Went the second time said I took everything he had brother snitcher I took everything he had and the man still he's still Crazy For You Jesus said I went by his house after I took all his livestock and his kids and I took his homes and I took all everything he had I emptied his bank account I went by his house and he's down there dancing and singing and praising God saying I Will Bless The Lord at all times and his praise shall continually be in my mouth and I believe that Jesus looked at the Devil and said I told you so I told you he was a servant I told you he was faithful I told you he wouldn't give up on me so I'll tell you what I'll do devil I'll let you touch his body just don't take his life you know the story job said job said his friends come over I said you need to stop job give up just quit job listened for about four or five scriptures and then he said hold your peace I don't know maybe in Tennessee it's a little different when I lived in Indiana that just meant shut up said shut up for a minute boys I know we're friends but he said I'm going to do some talking for a minute I'm G share something with you for a minute he said though he slay me he said you boys can give up if you want to and you can talk all day if you want to but I got a madeup mind though he slay me yet will I trust in him the storm is not going to steal my trust the storm is not going to steal my commitment the storm is not going to steal my praise the storm is not I wonder if there's somebody that's got a mind made up even when I don't understand what God's doing I'm going to keep on serving his wife came in said won't you just Curse God and die I love job right here when he got to respond to that cuz if I called my wife foolish she'd be looking for a new cuz she'd done beat me and buried me but job said you don't sound like the same woman I walked down the aisle with he said you might have been faking when you said I'll bless the Lord at all times and his praise shall continually be in my mouth he said right now woman you're talking a little foolish I wasn't faking I'm going to bless him when I'm sick I'm going to bless him when I'm broke I'm going to bless him when the world's cing in on me I'm G bless him when friends are betraying me I'm GNA bless him when the battles won't stop when they pile one upon another I Will Bless The Lord at all times I you when he speaks to me I want to listen I want to hear his command I want if he requires of me I want to freely give it when he wakes me up in the middle of the night I want to get up and follow his voice no matter where I am I no matter what I'm doing I want to be called a servant of the most high God Hallelujah Jesus Jesus spoke in the 25th chapter of Matthew about the unprofitable servant he spoke about the slothful servant but then he spoke about the good and the faithful servant I'm going to tell you something folks there's no room room in the kingdom of God for lazy Christians there's no room in the kingdom of God for sloths that just want to fill spots on pews God needs some good and Faithful Servants he needs some servants I don't know about you but I want to be his servant I don't want to be in and out I don't want to be fickle I want to be the one that the Alpha and the Omega can depend on I want to be the one that serves the beginning and the end the first and the last the bright and The Morning Star without him was not anything made that was made in him there is no variableness no shadow of turning he alone sits on the throne of Heaven he alone rules dominions and power he sets up Kings and he takes them down governments are still upon his shoulders he is still wonderful he is still the Mighty God the Everlasting father the prince of peace and the increase of his government of Peace there shall be no that is who you serve see I got to be a faithful servant and it's easy when I understand everything it's easy when I understand everything but God said I'm looking for some servants that'll worship me and serve me when I choose not to explain to them what I'm doing you see the devil didn't want job's sheep he didn't want job's servants he didn't want job's fields and his lands he didn't want his children he did not want his health he didn't want his wealth he didn't want his position in the community and it's for sure he didn't want his wife she was foolish what job was being robbed of was the devil wanted job's praise I ain't going there because brother white did it so eloquently on Wednesday job was fighting a devil that wanted to steal his worship ladies and gentlemen good and faithful servants are worshippers when things are good and when things are bad good and Faithful Servants worship when there's money in the bank and when your accounts in the negative good and Faithful Servants worship when the doctor gives a clean bill of health and when the doctor says I don't know if there's anything else I can do good and Faithful Servants Worship in the absence of explanation all he did all that he did to job's home and family and wealth and health was just the typ of the iceberg he lost it all he lost his family he lost his fortune he lost his future but what he really wanted to destroy in job's life was his heartfelt praise for Jehovah God it was the song in The Midnight Hour that that Satan wanted to take from job it was the praise in the midst of the storm that Satan wanted to take from job it was his dance it was his hand clap it was his shout of praise it was his sacrificial offering of worship that's what the devil hated the most about job so he took his health took his health he took his wealth he took his family but the one thing he couldn't take from job was the one thing he wanted the most job never lost his worship naked came I out of my mother's womb and naked shall I return thither the lord gave and the Lord hath taken away blessed be the name of the Lord it did not matter to job what he had in this world or what he did not have he was a good and a faithful servant I'm going to tell you something today I know some of you got to know my kids and my wife better than you've got to know me and AB was sitting in class one day somebody asked her do you even have a dad she said yeah I got a dad she said well who was that guy sitting by your mom at church the other night she said that's him and they they they so love being in school and believe it or not we spent 12 years pastoring and sister we absolutely loves being the janitor now and I mean we really went from pastor's wife to janitor and she loves it matter of fact I came here and I didn't even know I had a crush on the janitor and so uh somebody uh was was visiting our house and they said we thought she was a single mother I said my kids said no dad's just out preaching he's out doing things and so if I maybe you'll know me a little bit better when I'm done tonight but I I watched as my 60-year-old mother began to battle diabetes to the point that it had eat her kidneys up it had eat her vision up she had sores open sores the size of softballs on her legs I watched my mother even in all of that pain and all of that anguish when Church time rolled around I'd say Mom we can get the wheelchair and I can whe you over to the church and she said no as long as God lets me keep legs I want to walk to his house now we lived on property mom would walk over there in excruciating pain I don't mean to be too graphic in detail tonight but at times those sores had opened up so much that you could literally see her bone they had eat through every nerve and every tendon and every bit of Flesh there was it wasn't your typical diabetic ulcer mom got a disease from kidney dialysis that only 1% of dialysis patients get called Cal aaxis we didn't know there was a problem in her body until it it was a soar that would start on the inside of the Flesh and you didn't know it was an issue until it had already eat through all of the flesh once it hit the surface where you could see it it was already done its damage and we found my mother I would look over at her with tears streaming down her face I would watch Mom when well- bodied people were sitting on pews refusing to worship because they didn't get a sing or it wasn't their kind of song it wasn't their kind of service and they would sit there and pout and spew hatred upon the congregation because it wasn't what they expected Church to be but I'd watched my mother in excruciating pain grab the Pew in front of her and reach up and pull herself to her feet and begin to worship the King of Kings and the Lord of lords we didn't know why mom was going through everything she was going through but there was one thing it never stole from her brother white it never got her worship I'm going tell you something folks I don't know why the doctor's got to tell us cancer I don't know why the doctor's got to tell us the things he does but I'm going to tell you something if you'll keep your worship everything's going to be all right I was preaching for brother Dan hathway in pickle Ohio my mom called me and she said Jay I'm real tired I said well Mom you don't do nothing I don't mean that wrong she didn't have the strength to do much and I said why you so tired she said Jay I'm not that kind of tired you got to understand something I'm blessed my father's side I'm a fifth generation Apostolic I'm a fourth generation Apostolic preacher and not one time in that Legacy of preaching have we swayed away from from one Lord one faith and one baptism not one time in four generations have we stopped preaching Holiness without which no man shall see the Lord but on my mother's side my mother's mom my grandmother was a prostitute and my grandfather was a town drunk and my mom didn't have much chance of being a servant of the most high God 10 11 years old she would have to walk into strange houses and get her mom out and bring her home 10 11 years old she would walk her drunk father down the streets of Brazil Indiana to get him home to a place of safety my mother began to go to Sunday school brother white she began to go to Sunday school with her grandmother and she heard a song there that simply said oh I want to see him look upon his face there to sing forever of his Saving Grace on the streets of Glory let me lift my voice cares all passed home at last ever to rejoice and my mom left that house of a drunken father and a a mother of ill repute she left that home and she went walking one day at 12 years old went walking down a railroad track going to get to Grandma's house and she started singing oh I want to see him look up on his face face and the Holy Ghost fell on a railroad track in Brazil Indiana and baptized my mother with the spirit of and my mama said that day my family might have been alcoholics but I'm going to break a generational curse I'm going to break a curse and I'm going to raise boys and to be Servants of the most high God 14 years old at 14 years old my mother met my father he had just started preaching the gospel he was at a Revival with his dad and his dad got up and said come tomorrow night you can hear Marl Wayne preach his first sermon and that was when dad found out about it and so Dad didn't learn very much because cuz that's how he taught us boys I'd be playing the drums dad would take the floor to preach and he'd say folks put your hands together as brother Jason comes to break the word of God I'm going to tell you when that happens you immediately go into prayer and fasting they met they courted each other till they were 21 they got married and when my mother called me that weekend said I'm tired I came home I came home on a Monday morning to see the fact that my mother at 60 years old was about to meet her Creator it was a long week I didn't have any explanation I didn't understand it and I know I'm not crying many of you have lost parents much younger than I was but I didn't understand it I said God she's a faithful servant she worshiped you when the doctor doctors told us that there was no way she be should be able to Bear the pain and she would walk to church and she would walk in there stand on her feet and give you glory god why do you got to take her and I'm going to tell you something he never gave me an answer he never gave me an answer because it's not the servant's right to question the master came on Friday afternoon it became apparent that was the day that mom was going home I I said God I don't want to be in there my father said boys we're all going to be in there and we're going to stand beside her bed and I watched as my mother Drew her last breath at 60 years old without explanation I watched my father who had been her only boyfriend for 46 years she was the first person he talked to besides the Lord every day I watched him stand there and he didn't curse God he didn't give up on God but I watched him say Susie oh oh I want to see him look upon his face and the same song that my mother met the Lord the first time with she got to meet the Lord the final time with last three boys began to sing I'm not a singer my kids won't even let me try I thank God for a talented family they make me look better but y'all don't want me to sing I'm telling you but I sung that day and we said Mama just go on the streets of Glory and lift your voice I did not understand it but I had to stay faithful in the absence of explanation two years later two years later I was at the wedding the wedding rehearsal of my sister-in-law and brother-in-law we left a happy time we had had dinner together all of us and we left a very happy time we was all smiling we was all rejoicing it was a time of Celebration my father-in-law went by his house to pick up some things he was 56 years old 56 years old we went on to the church we were laughing we were cutting up we was teasing the bride and Grom to be and the phone rang and without explanation it was my mother-in-law on the other end of the phone and she said you better get to the house Dad has collapsed in the front yard I turned the corner it looked like a crime scene police officers fire trucks ambulances everywhere and for some unknown reason on the night before his daughter's wedding my father-in-law at 56 years old went to be with the Lord it was in the absence of explanation I didn't know how I didn't know what to say to my wife I didn't know how to explain it I didn't have any answers all I knew how to do was love her all I knew how to do was pray was to be there for her I didn't have the answers and God didn't give them to me you know what happened they said what are we going to do I said I'm going to tell some he do spend so much on this wedding if you want him to resurrect cancel this wedding I said you better go through with this so we went through with the wedding and I'm going to tell you the Spirit say it's just a wedding now the spirit of the Lord was in that room we got into that reception we got into that reception and the spirit of the Lord came in at a wedding reception and there was tongues and interpretation and people weeping in the Holy Ghost backsliders and all of a sudden I understood we got to stay strong in the absence of explanation it's not time to give up just because you don't understand it's not time to quit just because God doesn't explain there's a reward if you'll stay faithful give him praise two years later seemed like it was getting to be a real good pattern two years later we was on our way to buy stuff for Vacation Bible School my phone rang my brother said Jay dad has just had a heart attack cut con grass you better get to the hospital I was really afraid for every other year to roll around we laid there for six days six days we watched dad suffer and at 65 years old I had to tell my babies again for the third time in four years God has chosen to take another grandparent from you I didn't have the answers for my kids I didn't know I didn't know how to I didn't really know how to comfort them other than just love him hug him because I myself and in my flesh and and if you think bad of me I'm sorry but in my flesh I myself was saying God what are you doing what is going on but then I realized that the Lord gives and the Lord takes away but I kep let that stop my praise just a few years ago and I I hasten tonight I know the hour is drawing late and some of you have already got your reservations at Aubrey's just a few years ago I went six months with extreme health issues in my body every day I would pass blood in large measures it got to the point the doctors kept saying they couldn't find anything and I began to be very fearful ful I told my wife I said babe we we need to go take a trip I need to go spend a few days with the kids because I don't know what the future holds I don't know I don't know what's going on in my body and in case God is just about done with me we need to go spend some family time together we went away and we had a great time on our way home we talked about dreams we talked about the wha ifs of life I went to church on that Sunday morning sicker than I have ever been in my life I had been 5 days without being able to urinate five days I was so toxically infected I was so sick I was so sick my wife begged me not to go to church but I said a good servant goes to the house of God y'all didn't hear me everybody choose to stay home just cuz things ain't going good in your life life that's not a good servant a good servant gets up pulls their Bo bootstraps up and they make their way to the house of God I said baby I got to go to church I went to church sick I went to church so sick I preach to the best of my ability and you can tell by tonight that's not real good I give it everything I had after church I had a gentleman meet me in the middle aisle had a gentleman meet me in the middle aisle and he said uh pastor we need to we need to show you something over in the fellowship hall said over in the dining hall said we need to show you something and I went over there and when I walked in there had been a a formulation of people that just decided in that week that I was gone that they didn't want me to be Pastor anymore and there was there was about 30% or so of our church that was that just raised up and PE it was babies it was people whose babies I loved I dedicated I baptized them I loved them and all of a sudden they're rep opinion of me was different and I want to tell you something folks when I say to you that they literally fileted me that day in that Fellowship Hall I I I cannot tell you the things that there whoever said sticks and stones will break my bones but words will never hurt me was crazy because words cut and it hurt and it pushed me I called Pastor Carpenters first thing I did I walked out of that room I said I got I told my wife I said I got to I got to excuse myself I walked to the to the parking lot I called Pastor I said I need you right now I need you right now and he began to counsel me he began to talk with me and he walked with me through everything everything they tried to say he walked with me through it we had Bible answers we had every false accusation God we we had the answers to to that we had proof true answers but it still hurt me it still cut me and after talking and counseling with Pastor it became apparent that God was finished with me pastoring there and and I'm going to tell you something folks My Flesh didn't say God's done with me pastor and my flesh said God's done with me and I went into two years of the darkest depression that anybody could encounter and I'm not I'm not making light of yours I'm just telling you how dark it was for me and I've had preachers tell me God began to deal with me about 6 months ago about sharing this everywhere I went and I've had preachers tell me brother we you really shouldn't do that it makes you too vulnerable people going to think bad of you but I'm going to tell you something if I don't tell my testimony it's going to come on me again we win what did that song Say by the blood of the Lamb and the word I'm here to tell you depression does not have to kill you I mean so dark so dark that the only time I told God I ain't never preaching again when this happened I said I'm done I had my letter written I had my card in there I was sending it into the District board I was done so I thought but I didn't have the explanation I was done but he wasn't done I would sit for days on top of days in a dark bedroom we went and bought two sets of black curtains blackening curtains to block the light out because I was so overtaken with Darkness I literally had on my iPad I had search history of ways to take my life and make it look like an accident CU I didn't want my children to have to live with the legacy of a father who committed suicide but if I could make it look like an accident I would get up out of that bed brother Weatherly I would get up out of that bed and I would go preach and the only time the only time that that Spirit lifted off of me was when I was preaching the Gospel of Jesus Christ had people say you probably shouldn't have been preaching under that I'm going to tell you something if I would have quit preaching I wouldn't be here today it was those little breaths of reprieve when the Lord would say here I'm going to let the anointing lift that suicidal Spirit off of you for just a little while I go get in the car and before I could even get in the car car and drive to a restaurant to sit down with pastors before I could even do that that Spirit was back on me I would sit there across the table from pastors with blank stares on my face not knowing what to say not having anything to talk about and I didn't have an explanation why I went through such a betrayal I didn't have an explanation I I I tried to quit and God would not let me quit so the day came and a little borrowed two bedroom evangelist quarters that we were living in you see you got to understand Molly was born while we pastored Jackson was born while we pastored Abby was three years old when we started pastoring our oldest daughter Hannah who lives in Indiana was only about six years old when we started pastoring all my kids ever knew was we're the pastor's kids I watched their Ministries birth while I was Pastor I watched God give them talent and ability I watched him begin to do things in their life and in one Instant without an explanation I had to walk out of a meeting and tell my kids we're no longer the pastors we no longer have a home I lived in a parsonage we no longer have a home and in two years time I had perfect credit in reverse everything went wrong brother Johnstone everything went wrong I didn't have no money I didn't have a home for my babies I didn't have anything but I had a God that called me a servant and I could either be a slothful servant I could be an unprofitable servant or I could be a good and a faithful servant some of you didn't know me as a preacher some of you didn't even know I was brother Weir didn't even know there was a brother Weir some of you did know me by selling pocket knives because I love knives and ink pins and watches and if you're on my friend list and you're offended by me making fun of Stanley's I really am just doing that to poke the bear because I really don't want you to re to retaliate because I'm going to be in trouble if you see my knives I love pocket knives so it would not be strange it would not be strange for my family to come into that dark house and find me with an accidental cut that took my life I had it all laid out I'm in a house alone a borrowed two bed bedroom little small it was a garage converted into an evangelist quarters I'm in a house that I wouldn't even turn the lights on folks everything I did when my family would leave was in the dark I was so eat up with depression and I had it all planned this is how I'm going to take my life and as I'm sitting at that table ready to take my life I hear the voice of my father scream my name now God might give you this great Angelic visitation where the sky is open and the birds are chirping and the flowers are blooming but he don't talk to me that way he got to scream at this old stubborn boy I hear my father's voice say Jason stop it said Dad you've been dead 10 years and I hear his voice again Jason God's not through with you yet and as I listened and you can think I'm crazy you can write me off as a nutcase maybe I am maybe I'm not but I'm going to tell you something as I listened to the voice of my father screamed my name that voice transitioned into the voice of Pastor Carpenter saying Jason don't do this God's not through with you and I realized that the two Pastors in my life God had used their voices to get my attention oh I wish somebody love the Lord for a minute there's some men and women in this room that's living what I'm preaching about you're living what I'm preaching about it's that moment of no understanding when a spouse decides that they're done being married to you without explanation it's that moment when that child that you raised to live for God walks out of the church church and says I'm not coming back and they don't give you an explanation it's that moment when you see your finances crumble and you don't have enough money to pay attention you don't have anything you lose it all you don't have anything it's in that moment when God calls you and you decide if I'm going to be a good and a faithful servant when all this happened we give everything we had away Only Furniture we had was a hope chest to my wife's and just a few chairs we moved down here we moved to an Airbnb for two months and sister Carpenter called us one day and said I got a phone number for you I'm just going to show you how God does when you serve him in the absence of explanation so I got a phone number for you so you need call it's a house four minutes from the church we was living in Kodak My Wife and Kids was driving back and forth twice every day to come to school sister Weir was driving over here to work and and she said I got a I got a phone call for you a number you need to call it's it's it's it's a house just four minutes from the church and I said boy that would be good that' sure be good and and and when we called the the dear sister in this church the dear sister in this church she began to talk to us and she said well I was going to leas that house fully furnished is that a problem I said Lord is that a problem let me tell you that's an answer from Heaven say that's just something little I'm going to tell you little or big God rewards you when you stay faithful in the absence of explanation hallelujah hallelujah I got a call right after we move there from my dear friend probably one of my greatest friends Pastor Jordan aason called me said man I don't know why but God wants you to come over here for a week I said well God wants it let's go and he put me in a motel room and he said all I want you to do is I want you to get up in the morning come teach the R3 guys teach them for about two hours and then he said I feel like God told me to tell you to go stay in that room that he's got a word for you okay I'm sitting in this motel room by myself and that Spirit of Darkness start trying to come back on me brother white I start feeling that same Spirit start feeling it and then I heard the voice of the Lord again and the voice of the Lord said if you'll stay faithful for just a few more days in the absence of explanation I'm going to open the windows of Heaven upon you because you were a faithful servant when you should have gave up listen if I'd have done what Jason wanted to do I'd have quit preaching I'd have found me a spot on a Pew and just been a good Saint somewhere but God said no I need you to keep serving even when you're wounded I need you to serve when you don't understand I need you to serve when you don't have any answers was in that room that the spirit of the Lord spoke to me about the absence of explanation and I'm going to tell you if we're honest tonight we've all went through things and some of us going through things right now that we need answers for but I've come to give you this divine revelation tonight and I hasten to a close a good teacher never answers questions while they're still giving you a test but when the test is over the king's going to give you an understanding I come back to job because job stayed faithful because job said those skin worms destroy my flesh yet will I trust in him oh he said I'm going I know my redeemer liveth I know he lives listen I'm going to tell you something folks there's just something about knowing that God's still alive in your situation that'll make everything level out there's something about knowing that God has not forsaken you he's not done with you he's not give up on you depression cannot hold you depression cannot kill you sickness cannot have you worry cannot take your peace anxiety cannot stop you a good teacher a good teacher and might I remind you he is the Incarnate truth he is the great teacher a good teacher never answers questions while you're still in the test oh would you reach for the Lord for a moment God I don't know why you took my mom and dad sorely I don't know why you took my father-in-law I don't know why I had to suffer betrayal I don't know why I had to be hurt and cut so deeply but Lord the very fact that in the last two and a half years over 220 people have been baptized in the name of Jesus in places that you have allowed us to minister I would go through every bit of of it again to know that being a servant added to the kingdom of heaven I had people tell me when I said I was moving to marille oh you must have failed you must have needed to be restored that's not the case matter of fact I asked brother Carpenter I asked Pastor should I take some time he said 'lord no he Saidi want you preaching 58 weeks a year but I'm going to tell you this much I'm glad to be a part of a church that believes in restoration because one day God forbid but one day one of my kids might fall out of the Ark of Safety and I want them to know there's a church that'll love you without explanation there's an altar that'll love you without not being explained what you went through John you can stand with me if you will if you're able John was boiled in oil but that didn't kill him they banished him to the rocky islands of patmas that's where a lot of people would give up they say it's always it's too hard for me but John the Beloved said I I was in the spirit on the Lord's day that's a good and a faithful servant I wonder if there's a King David in this place that knows how to bring home the presence of the Lord I wonder I wonder if you're going to be able to offer worship when you don't understand what you're going through I wonder if you can offer worship when the death angel visits your home out of out of time and it doesn't seem like it's the right time I wonder if you can serve God when the Betrayal of those you love walk away from you that child that you raised at an altar walks away from truth I wonder nowhere in the whole book of job did God ever explain himself to job nowhere find no place where God gave an explanation but I do find this at the end of job he had the fairest daughters not just in the East but the Bible says he had the fairest in all of the land and I read about job in the first chapter he was the greatest in all of the East but in the last chapter he was the greatest in all of the land god enlarged his territory and blessed him with a double portion of everything his battle took because job stayed faith faithful in the absence of explanation I'm going to tell you God wants to give your family a double portion but you got to worship when you're going through the battle you got to serve him when you're going through the storm and I close with this we are often tossed and driven on the Restless sea of time somber skies and H Tempest off succeed the bright sunshine in a Land of perfect day when the Mist has rolled away we will understand it better by and by by and by when the morning comes when all the saints of God are gathered home we're going to tell the story of how I kept on serving when when I didn't have an explanation how I kept on loving him when suicide was on my mind how I kept on loving him we we're going to tell how we've overcome this altar is open somebody ought to come up here with a declaration I am a good and a faithful servant I TR today the day that depression leads you today the day that anxiety leads you young lady today the day when God answers your prayer you got to stay faithful when you don't understand who will never never I trust come on I feel the spirit of depression lifting off a men right now you're going to rise with boldness you're going to rise with authority Ministry what you do what you do and Minister tonight I sa the one who will never he will never I trust in God my sa who will never he will never fa I trust in God my saor one who will never he will never blessed assur Jesus is my he's been my forth man in the Time After Time born of his Spirit I'm washed in his blood and what he did for me on calary is more than I trust in God's my sa one who will he will never I trust I trust in God come on do you trust in him God I don't understand but I still trust in you he will never I trust God my saor the one who will God who will never we will never come on God's about to heal your insecurities come on young lady God's going to give you your strength back God's going to give you your confidence back St stay faithful he answer I the Lord he heard he I saw the Lord and he heard answer that's why I trust that's why I trust him I the Lord and he and I the Lord and and he answer I saw the Lord and he Hur and he that's why I TR that's why I the he h and he I the he h and he I the and he h and he that's why I TR that's why I trust the one the one he will never I TR God come on somebody needs to forgive somebody right now you need to release them in the spirit right now God's about to rain the Windows of Heaven upon you young lady you're going to be able to look yourself in the mirror again and you're going to have confidence cuz the king of glory loves you even when you don't understand even when you don't understand TR God my huh come on man you're not admitting weakness to say I've got some depression I got some battles that's Waring against me if you give to the master he's going to take it today a the one who will never say something and I'll be done I feel today and I'm going to step out of the way I'm not a prophet or the son of a prophet but I feel today there's some men and women that the enemy said if you go up there and admit that you're battling anxiety or you're battling depression or you're battling the spirits people's going to think you're weak they're going to think you you failed God but I want to remind you every one of those things came on job because he had not failed God and one of the hardest things I ever had to do was stand in front of a congregation stand in front of my children and let them hear me say for the first time that I had the plan and I had everything in place saying that out loud and admitting in front of God in a congregation of people that took more strength than just staying in that depression you're not weak by admitting that the enemy's Waring against your soul the longer we stay in this race the more he's going to war against your soul you are made strong and you are made an overcomer by saying hey the enemy's been on me but I am still standing I am still in the fight I am still a servant