Marriage | Senior Pastor Kenneth Carpenter by Kenneth Carpenter First Apostolic Church of Maryville (Maryville, TN) Kind: teaching Scripture: Genesis 2:15-18, Matthew 19:4-6, Ecclesiastes 4:7-16, Genesis 2:21-24, Ephesians 5:25-33, Genesis 3:17-19, Luke 22:42-44, Proverbs 24:27, Ecclesiastes 3:1-8, Ecclesiastes 3:11 Source: https://acts238.life/repository/sermons/kenneth-carpenter--marriage Published by Acts 2:38 Life from the sermon transcript on that page. Free to copy and share with attribution. ------------------------------------------------------------ have your bibles would open up to the book of genesis chapter number two thank you praise team tonight for taking us into the presence of the lord genesis chapter 2 and we're going to begin reading at verse number 15. i'm going to explain a little something to you um we've been on a series on on holiness and um holiness uh uh both uh internally and uh externally and and i'd say holiness is eternally amen and uh so um we dealt with the distinction last week we dealt with the distinction between a man and a woman and how that hair plays a role in that god given that god-given creation of distinction and how hair played a plays a role in in that and as i i always take this very seriously so i always go to god in prayer before i ever come to this pulpit i want to i want i want to follow the direction of the lord and uh i had something in my mind of following on with distinction but the lord touched my heart today that tonight i was to teach on marriage i was to teach on marriage tonight and genesis chapter 2 and verse number 15 i believe our marriage is just as important as our distinction and the lord god took the man and put him into the garden of eden to dress it and to keep it and the lord god commanded the man saying of every tree of the garden thou mayest freely eat but of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil thou shalt not eat of it for in the day that thou eatest thereof thou shalt surely die and the lord god said it is not good that man that the man should be alone i will make him a help meet for him now turn with me in your bibles to matthew chapter 19 the gospel of matthew chapter 19 and we'll begin reading in verse number four they questioned jesus about marriage and he answered and said unto them have you not read that he which made them at the beginning made them male and female and said for this cause shall a man leave his father and mother and shall cleave to his wife and they twain shall be one flesh wherefore they are no more twain that word means two but one flesh what therefore god hath joined together let not man put asunder lay your bible down let's pray right now father i ask you tonight that you would anoint my heart to teach on the subject of marriage tonight lord you would anoint us god it is your will lord that we have healthy marriages in this church it is your will o god that our marriages be lord healthy spiritually god that we have strong vibrant families mothers and fathers raising godly children lord i pray tonight that you would anoint our hearts that we could see exactly your word we'll give you the praise and the honor bless these precious people that have come tonight god bless these wonderful faithful people that are here tonight we'll give you praise and honor in jesus name we pray amen you may be seated god said in verse number 18 genesis 2 and verse number 18 god said it is not good that the man would be alone it is it is not good that the man would be alone now we do understand when we read this that this is not god this is not god looking out over creation and saying oops it's not god looking out over creation and saying oh hey i'm i'm sorry i i i i didn't do this quite right it's not good for the man to be alone god is not making that statement for his sake he is actually making that statement for our sake so that we can begin to understand the importance and the value of marriage it is not good for the man to be alone i i wonder tonight if the greatest battle of covet is going to be can can people actually survive that have been alone for so long can they actually can they actually survive will will will they survive this time next year or when a back scene comes out and covet is in our rear-view mirror uh i certainly hope and pray that we don't lose souls that we don't lose souls souls that were thriving before covet souls that were thriving before covet living for god but now a season of separation could take a toil because it's not good for man to be alone it's not good for men to be alone um turn with me if you would to um the book of ecclesiastes ecclesiastes um ecclesiastes i believe i'm warning chapter 4 and verse number 7 god said it's not good that man would be alone it's not good i don't really think that we need to go into a lot of uh explanation i think we just need to be uh believers of the bible if god says it's not good for man to be alone i don't need stats from some laboratory to tell me if god says it's not good for man to be alone drive a nail in it just believe it it's not good for man to be alone the wisest man to ever live besides jesus christ i guess we could call him the second wisest man to ever live his name was solomon solomon wrote a book called ecclesiastes and it's a it's a a a a book of him surveying the behavior of mankind he he surveyed people's behavior and then he would write about what he would see and in ecclesiastes chapter 4 and verse number 7 he says then i returned and i saw vanity under the sun now he said i'm going to tell you what i saw it was vanity this word vanity means emptiness it is empty it is of no value i guess we could also say it is not good he said i want to show you something that is empty of no value i want to show you something that is not good verse eight there is one alone so i want to show you something that's not good it's empty it's vain there is one alone and there is not a second yay he hath neither child nor brother yet is there no end of all of his labor he said this man it doesn't have a second he doesn't have a friend he doesn't have a child he doesn't have a brother but then he notes that there's no end to all of his labor he's just always busy working neither is his eye satisfied with riches neither saith he for whom do i labor and bereave my soul of good this is also vanity yea it is sore travail now he simply says there's there's a person that is alone and it's not good to be alone and this person is trying to feel the loneliness of your soul with material things he is trying he has a he has a gaping hole in his soul he has an empty spot in his soul and he has neither child that means he's not married he has a brother he's not associated with his family he's all alone and he's trying desperately to make more and more and have more and have more and have more because he's trying to fill his loneliness with material things can we all say man tonight that material things will never feel the loneliness that god placed in us he said she's all alone he said he doesn't even consider when he dies when he dies who's he going to leave all this to he's not even considering when it when he dies who would he leave it and then solomon says this is uh sore it's vanity and it's sore travail and then verse number nine he gives the antidote he he tells you what would make this better two are better than one look at this two are better than one because they have a good reward for their labor for if they fall the one will lift up his fellow but woe to him that is alone when he falleth for he hath not another to help him up again if two lie together they have heat but how can one be warm alone and if one prevail against him two shall withstand him and a threefold cord is not quickly broken now listen to him he begins to tell you that god said it's not good for man to be alone and then solomon says two are better than one for they have a greater reward they have a greater reward for their labor two can put two ca who can can can work harder together than you can by yourself uh since they have a good reward for their for their for their for their labor he goes in he even talks about safety he says he says a woe to somebody that is alone and they fall there's a loan when they fall we have a rule in our house we have a swimming pool and we have a a rule and it's never br it's never broken it's never broken no one swims alone no one swims alone we never allow anyone as a matter of fact we don't even allow anyone to go out around yeah sometimes i want to go out there and study by myself and i just worry sister carpenter death she'll come out there and check and i'll she'll get that sometimes i got my uh ear buds in and i'm listening to something and next thing i know i look up and she's what are you doing you know i've been hollering thinking you'd be floating face down in this pool you know well you know something i think that's a good rule to have so i'm an expert swimmer you might be but you might slip and hit your head and uh now you know i'm not necessarily talking about safety tonight how about spiritual safety do you know that's why pastor erickson has got the revival of our care groups going is because care groups keep us connected to other people and it's not good for us to be alone he says if they'd fall you'd have a fellow there to pick him up and then he goes into war he says if you're all by yourself and you get attacked you're fighting all by yourself but said if you've got somebody with you if you've got somebody with you they can help you and they can fight they can fight with you it goes all the way down goes all the way down to verse number 13 and he tells he tells a little story here in verse number 13. he says better is a poor and wise child better is the poor now get the image now better is a poor and wise child than an old and foolish king who will be no more who will no more be admonished he said you can have a man that's a king he's got a kingdom he's got power but solomon said give me a homeless child give me a poverty-stricken child give me a give me a dirty face unkept child that'll listen to instructions from another and said that unkept homeless child because he will listen and knows he had a has a need of another he's better he's better than an old and foolish king who will no more be admonished boy i'll tell you it's a sad day when men and women dwell alone and they think you know they're kind of like job's friend job had a friend he's always telling job what job ought to be doing and how job was doing wrong and job made a statement to him he said i reckon that when you die all knowledge shall cease from the earth i think he was calling him a know-it-all woe be to the man or woman that thinks they know it all woe me to the person that can't be admonished they don't have anything listen god says it's better to be a dirty-faced unkept kid that'll stand and look up to somebody and say hey i need some help mister can you give me some advice he said it's better to be that kid than an old and foolish king that you can't tell him anything boy i almost won't stop right there and pray god i don't want to be an old and foolish king that nobody can tell me anything nobody nobody can offer me some some some advice well hey you don't stop talking about him it says for out at verse 14 for out of prison he cometh to reign wait a minute for out of prison he cometh to reign yeah that's right for out of prison that's the verse would you would you put ecclesiastes chapter 4 verse 14 up on the screen ecclesiastes 4 14 where does this old foolish king that can't be admonished nobody can tell him something where does he reign from prison prison do you know people that think they have freedom by being alone are nothing more than a bunch of people in prison where's he come out of he comes out of prison he's a prisoner to his own ideas he's a legend in his own mind man he thinks listen he thinks everybody's out of step but him he thinks everybody's doing it wrong but him you know if you got 10 windmills over here on the hill and all of the windmills are blowing the same direction all the wheels are turning this way all the wheels are turning this way and you got one windmill that's going that way and somebody tells you there's one windmill up on that hill that's tore up which windmill you think it is it's the one turning the wrong way you see i'm gonna find me some comfort i'm gonna find me some comfort with being a part of a church i'm gonna find me some comfort with getting a part of some a men's group or i'm gonna find me some comfort in getting a part of a youth group to where i don't think that i know it all maybe i need to hear somebody say you know you need to look at this this way you need to understand this this way don't be a prisoner says for out of for out of prison he cometh to reign verse 14 whereas also he that is born in his kingdom becometh poor you see there's one thing you don't want to do is to be born in the house of somebody that knows it all because you're going to become poor you don't want to be born in the kingdom of the man that thinks he knows it all because your children will become poor um let me go ahead and read the the last couple of verses i considered all the living which walk under the sun with the second child that shall stand up in his stead there is no end of all the people even of all that have been before them they also that that come after shall not rejoice in him surely this also is vanity and vexation of spirit it is not good that man would be alone it's interesting thing what god had to do in marriage you'll turn back to genesis chapter 2 and verse number 21. the cost of adam's marriage and i know there may be a few giggles here now and then but the cost of a good marriage is that a man has to die a man has to die adam it's not good for you to be alone so therefore i have to cause a deep sleep to fall upon adam want a good marriage want a good marriage if you want a good marriage the man has to die there's no way you can have a good marriage without the man dying it's how it's how god brought a a wife to adam the bible said god caused a deep sleep to fall upon adam and he slept and he took one of his ribs closed up the flesh instead thereof and with the rib which the lord god had taken from the man made he a woman and brought her unto the man and adam said this is now bone of my bone flesh of my flesh she shall be called woman because she was taken out of the man therefore shall a man leave his father and mother shall cleave unto his wife and they too shall be one flesh one flesh again in order for god to make a marriage the man had to die the man had to die now i hope this balances out because in a few moments i'm going to tell you what else it takes for a marriage is the woman has to submit you can't have a good marriage unless a man dies and the woman submits why mary let's just be transparent tonight those of you that are married i fall under one of those k i fall under that category two why'd i get married i'll tell you why i got married i was lonely i was lonely can i get a witness i think i hear brother orr saying right right brother donny he's he's giving me a good old phenomenal nod over there he's right he got married because you were lonely oh you were by yourself and i went by myself i had all kind of friends to run with had all kind of friends i ran with but they got old running with running with neon and mark got old i don't care they call us the three musketeers it got old that's right it got old because god never intended that to fulfill the lonely place y'all are really going to make me preach tonight aren't you you know why we got married we were lonely you know why we were lonely because that's the way god made us god made the man listen no lone rangers no john wayne's no clint eastwood's come on now no marlboro man god made the man to be lonely god made the man to be lonely i got married because i was lonely i was lonely because i was not complete what a what a plan that god has why we wouldn't just want to thank god for this plan called marriage what a plan that god has this thing called marriage i was lonely i was not complete now as i'm going to teach on marriage tonight i want to say something to the single people tonight and this is what i'm going to say to you i want to say to you stop trying to find a good mate just start working on being a good mate and it'll take care of itself stop trying to find a good mate and just work on being a good mate and god will connect the dots god will bring it together and i'll tell you something else about single people and this is for us married people sometimes things are said to single people that i really don't know that i don't really think we know how bad we hurt their feelings when they get 18 19 20 21 22 23 and we start saying you're not married yet let's stop doing that what if they're 30 years old that's all right if they haven't found the one they want to spend the rest of their life with let them be 45. but let's let's stop putting undue pressure there's nothing wrong with you tonight if you're 25 years old and you're single here tonight there's nothing wrong with you that's free i was 24 before i got married and i can remember around 22 23 people starting to say you think you're always going to be single and i'd say i hope to god i'm not because i'm lonely i'm lonely turn with me to um ephesians chapter 5 ephesians chapter 5 and verse number 25. what does it take for a good marriage man has to die the woman has to submit husbands love your wives where do you get that the man has to die brother carpenter right here husbands love your wives even as christ also loved the church and gave himself for it do you know how jesus got a bride he died for it and then he turns right around in the scripture and he tells me the husband that i am to love my wife as christ loved the church it means i've got to die not physically but i've got to die to my will just as christ died to his will look at him in the garden of gethsemane father if it be possible let this cup pass from me what was speaking there brother white the human will the human nature of jesus was saying i don't want to die but then the human nature gave way to the plan of god because god has a far better plan than you or i can come up with on our own let's follow god's plan nevertheless not as i will but as you will husbands love your wives even as christ also loved the church and gave himself for it that he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of the water by the word that he might present it to himself a glorious church not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing but that it should be holy and without blemish so ought men to love their wives as their own bodies oh god help us to understand that help us to understand how close husbands and wives are to be we're not just to share the same checkbook we're not just to share the same address we're not just to share the same bed we are to love as our own body he said in verse number 28 he says that so ought men to love their wives as their own bodies he that loveth his wife loveth himself so the more i nourish her the more i am loving myself for no man ever yet hated his own flesh but nourish and cherish it even as the lord the church for we are members of his body and of his flesh and of his bones for this cause shall a man leave his father and mother and shall be joined unto his wife and they too shall be one flesh this is a great mystery but i speak concerning christ in the church nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as as himself and the wife see that she reverence her husband see how this is balancing things out beautifully so the woman is not feeling tonight like when you preach mother carpenters always the woman is supposed to submit why would you not want to submit to a man who's willing to die for you why would you not want to submit to a man that that that that submits himself to god to his own will who looks at the culture of the world and the culture of the world that is that is beating up marriage and conventional biblical marriage and see a man that says i'm willing to make a lifetime commitment to you i'm willing to die for you i'm willing to lose my identity so that we have our identity together now along the way tonight i have some things written down that i won't just talk about marriage tonight i i want to say i want to say to every wife here tonight don't be deceived you can't fix your husband i'm going to say to every man here tonight you can't fix your wife stop trying oh i'm going to change him no you're not if it's a true biblical marriage the only one that can change him is his head which is christ the only one that can change a husband or a wife is god that's why a husband should pray to god for his wife that's why a wife should pray to god for her husband if your husband needs changing talk to the one that can change him if your wife needs changing talk to the one that can change her how many believes god answers prayer there's some marriages that are not healthy and they're not healthy because you have mates trying to change each other and it becomes a war zone the man's not willing to die and the woman's not willing to submit and it just becomes a glorified talk show where they're trying to talk over each other nobody don't know about you but we only get to live one life and i don't want to go through that one life miserable if my wife has an issue i know the one to go talk to and that is god and god can talk to her spirit and god can talk to her heart and god can talk to her mind and god can change any behavior can i please get an amen tonight that is the truth pray for your mate ask god to touch their hearts pray for their mate pray for your mate half of the amount of time you posted on social media pray for your mate half the period of time you spent with a boy's night out or a girl's night out and i don't understand that when i'm sorry i'm just 60 and i'm old-fashioned but i had enough boys nights out all right you see the glue to a marriage is made up of three ingredients the glue to a marriage is made up of three ingredients number one god number two a man who is in a personal relationship with god number three a woman that is in a personal relationship with god these three ingredients are needed for a good marriage god a man not just a male but a man that's in a good relationship with god a woman not just a female but a woman that's in a good relationship with god you may think that that is not important but i promise you tonight there is 99.9 of things that can be fixed in both a man and a woman if they'll line themselves up with god a lot of things can get fixed in a hurry if a man will just pray through and stay prayed through there's a lot of things that can get fixed in a hurry the woman will pray through and stay prayed through because when you get two people that are not in a relationship with god you have two human spirits he wants his way she wants her way and it's a battleship time and you can have counseling session after counseling session and marriage retreat after marriage retreat and you just go through life accepting that every so many weeks we're gonna have a big blow up in so many weeks we're gonna have a big somebody's gonna go you know to the couch somebody's gonna go and spend a few weeks in a hotel dear god of heaven that should not be in the apostolic church that should not be in the apostolic church grow up grow up that's why now let me go back to our singles tonight don't think that you're going to marry he's not really on fire for god he has no spiritual appetite and and you can tell that by observance just watch him during church or watch her during church if she's more concerned with the shine on her nose and he's more concerned with the score of the basketball game see you don't need to get married just because somewhere years ago at a youth camp they prayed through and somewhere when he was seven years old he got baptized and he attends church those are sorry reasons to get married marry you somebody boy don't get involved with a girl unless you know she has a personal relationship with god well how can i know that see if she worships when everybody else comes up around the altar is she still standing back eight cues deep in the pew waiting for him i'm telling you more than likely she's not in a relationship with god when we're up here around here ah come on now right right i'm just trying to give our kids some good advice tonight because i don't want them to go through an unhappy marriage and i sure don't want them to go through a divorce right so what we need is god we need a man in the relationship with god and we need a woman in a relationship with god and even at that they'll have challenges it's true it's just the truth i can't add to it it's just the truth you want to know if they're spiritual or not watch them during church you want to know if they're in a personal relationship with god do they come to midweek bible study are they alone oh well he'd get involved in the eucharist but he he just don't like the no you know the the boys in the youth group they're this and they're that you know what ought to be all kind of alerts going off women that means he can't he can't blend into the crowd he can't believe it she can't blend into the crowd she has to be the queen of the party and she has to be the queen of the party and the youth group then when y'all get married guess what party she's got to be the queen of then you're home i know it's just simple it's just simple just open your eyes look around are they praying are they in the prayer room do they have a bible with them you know you you there there's three ingredients to there's three ingredients to concrete you got to have water sand and concrete mix and you got to put them together and you got to mix them you got to mix you gotta mix them up you know what's work to have a good marriage it is work don't let anybody fool you don't even contemplate getting married if you're not willing to roll up your sleeves and work not just physically and i'll talk about that in just a moment but it's work to have a good marriage do not believe it it is not in the bible it is not scriptural marriages are made in heaven they are not they are not and don't believe don't believe that our lives were like two streams that just flowed down the beautiful green mountain and flowed into one and made one no your lives are as two freight trains coming together that's the truth you want a good marriage every good marriage in this church tonight has worked at it every good marriage has had to work at it as a matter of fact give me genesis chapter 3 and verse number 17. genesis chapter 3 and verse number 17. come on adam genesis 3 17. if you've got it say amen and unto adam he said because thou has hearkened unto the voice of thy wife and has eaten of the tree which i commanded thee saying thou shalt not eat of it cursed is the ground for thy sake and sorrow shalt thou eat of it all the days of thy life let me read on thorns and also thistle shall it bring forth unto thee and thou shalt eat the herb of the field in the sweat of thy face there it is sweat you see adam you're married now you're married now and can i can i can i introduce you to something called work and sweat because it's going to take work and sweat to take care of that wife turn with me to luke chapter 22. luke chapter 22 everybody say sweat luke chapter 22 and verse number 44. excuse me let's start reading at verse number 22 jesus is going to get him a wife he's going to go to calvary and get him a wife he's going to go shed his blood he's going to die he's going to get him a wife well let's see how jesus gets him a wife verse 42 saying father thou if thou be willing remove this cup from me nevertheless not my will but thine will be done there appeared an angel unto him from heaven strengthening him and being in an agony he prayed more earnestly and his sweat was as it were great drops of blood falling to the ground what are you doing adam i'm earning some bread for my family what are you doing son of god i am praying because i'm going to marry me a wife and it's going to take sweat it's going to take it's going to take work work it's going to take work it's going to take work would you lift your hands for just a moment and would you just worship the lord for just a moment come on you can do a little bit better than that huh let's ask god to bless our marriages right now shall we won't we let's just ask god to touch our marriages tonight because it's going to take it's going to take work go ahead just ask god give me um give me ecclesiastes excuse excuse me i'm sorry give me proverbs chapter 24 verse number 27. proverbs 24 verse number 27 good marriage work now i guess i go back to the singles tonight i go i guess i'll go back to those that will be married one day those that oh it's nothing wrong with you that that you're lonely and and and you're looking for the day that you're married and if if you are a young man um i'm gonna say a couple of things tonight um you get out of high school don't let that be the height of your standard maybe determined to go and get a skilled trade learn a trade maybe you're going to college for a couple more years maybe four more years you learn a skilled a a skilled trade proverbs 24 27 backs this up he says to a young man prepare thy work without and make it fit for thyself in the field and afterwards build thine house now you can break that verse down and simply say this he says to the young man find a trade find a trade prepare that work without and then he said make it fit in the field in other words buy you a field build you a house afterwards build a house get married i i know this may not sound real spiritual tonight but i really believe that if we can get in the minds of our of our youth a work ethic nobody's going to keep you up we shouldn't expect anybody to keep us up don't care how well mom and dad have done for themselves i don't care how good memo and peppo have done for themselves you got to get out of high school you got to go on to college you got to learn to trade all right and it would be good not to not to be married in this season until you get you a good trade down because there's more people that divorce over money than any other any other thing any other the thing in their life is money or the lack thereof or the abuse thereof i could throw that in and so we would do good to get a mindset and let me just say this not all you young men in this church are going to be preachers not all you young girls in this church are going to be missionaries god's going to raise some of you all up yes to be a part of the kingdom of god but god may want you to develop a certain trade stay right here in this local church support this local church with tithe and offerings and be able to support missionaries that's right but somehow we put preachers way up here we put preachers way up here on on a pedestal that i if i'm ever going to do something for god i'm going i've got to be a preacher that is not the truth one sows one waters and god gives the increase can i tell you a lot of places i go around the world and preach i go on a plane ticket that was bought by someone that had a trade that builds houses or that sells cars or that does plumbing and they pay their tithe and they give their offerings and when i need to go visit the missionaries i can just go get a check and go somewhere and fly and preach to them do you think god's going to up in heaven sister ammons god's going to walk out with a great big old huge crowd and say here kenny carpenter here's your great big crown for all you've done foolishness on that god's gonna walk out and god's gonna say wait a minute kathy belcher you served god you worked and kept people and you paid time and you gave offerings and you supported the house of god and here you go here here you go here you go sister shark here you all go can i tell you tonight young men don't be condemned that you're not a preacher that you failed something god may want you to get a few years at ut or a few years at pellissippi and learn a trade and be in an office somewhere in this town and be a good representative for his name if we don't watch it in pentecost we're going to put preachers way up here we're going to put them way up here buddy and none of you little people down here and then you little people oh let me do it let me do it real good none of you little people can you do this hey how you doing there ain't good to see you see here in this corner all you little people out here we'll get these preachers oh all you little people out here oh yeah oh you little folks out here that's right oh you little people out here don't you know that the preacher he's the big he's the big kahuna he's the big one oh you've got to be a preacher or you've got to be a jimmy tony you've got to be a raymond woodward to be somebody in the kingdom that is foolishness i want you to know that if you go over here you get out of the 12th grade you get out of here and you learn maybe a skill of being a plumber or you learn a skill of being an electrician or you learn a skill of being a salesman and you live for god and serve god and shout the victory down here i want you to know you are co-equal with that pastor you're co-equal with them come on stand with me tonight prepare your work just remain standing i'm i'm as done as a steak that's been on the grill for six hours right now if you don't get a hold of this i'm talking only just singles i'm talking about us married folks us married folks us married folks marriage is maintenance maintenance maintenance maintenance maintenance maintenance i take care of that marriage gotta take care of that marriage come on now you gotta take care of that marriage you might have a house full of kids but every now and then you gotta you gotta get away with just you and her maintain that marriage maintenance that marriage it's the truth you you got to understand that kids and this is god this is god's order god never said i was one with my kids these too many marriages are separate because we ain't cut the umbilical cord i remember when i i thought zach was gonna marry lauren gonna ask her for his hand for her hand and marriage i told her i looked around i said i'm gonna tell you something i said that boy one day tells you he wants to take you to georgia oh daddy he won't do that i said oh no no no i said he wants to take you you gotta say don't you say yes tim and every father and every father-in-law needs to go through the joy of making that that boy sweat bullets when they're asking right right god never said we were one with our kids you find it in the bible god never said we're one he only said we're one with our mate so you ought to be working mom dad you ought to be working for years to put yourself out of business that's right put yourself out of business and then when they get out on their own what are they going to do what are they going to do they're over there at that house and they've got disagreements bless god the same thing you did you come to church hey to me sanctified folks here tonight david you all know y'all come to church mad at one another oh lord we got some folks waving their hands tonight a long ride home for some of you y'all ain't sanctified you get married and work things out works out better when mom and dad mama memo and mother-in-law and everybody else stays out of it matter of fact i see it this way sometimes when husband and wife got back together in-laws are still at it i'm going to read a couple of verses you're going to go home ecclesiastes chapter 3 and verse number 1 you got to have this in your marriage ecclesiastes 3 and verse number 1. to everything there is a season a time to every purpose under heaven a time to be born a time to die a time to plant a time to pluck up that which is planted a time to kill please don't do that a time to heal a time to break down a time to build up a time to weep a time to laugh a time to mourn a time to dance a time to cast away stones a time together stones together a time to embrace a time to refrain from embracing a time to get a time to lose a time to keep a time to cast away a time to rend a time to sow a time to keep silent a time to speak a time to love a time to hate a time of war a time of peace in marriage you're not going to have one time i don't want to read that again i got wore out just reading it you hear me it's not going to be one glorious honeymoon but if we will allow god to help us we will have verse 11 of chapter three god hath made everything beautiful in his time also he has set the world in their hearts so that they cannot find out all the work that god maketh from the beginning to the end what he's saying there is simply this you're going to have a time in your marriage it's not your favorite time if you'll let the favorite time and the least favorite times blend together god will make everything beautiful in his time you'll set as older people maybe 60 years old and maybe 53 years old you'll sit and laugh at arguments you had back when you were in your 20s can you believe what a jerk i was can you even believe it but god makes everything beautiful in his time i know some of you may have come tonight want me to teach on some kind of outward and we'll get to that but what good would it do to have all those t's crossed and all those eyes dotted if our marriages are not healthy would you just lift your hands tonight god would you heal every marriage in this room right now god would you lead every young person every single young person god would you help them to become that mate that you're going to send them somebody god i ask you tonight to let the marriages of this church be healthy oh god i ask you to not lord the challenges that some of the couples are facing right now god let your wonderful spirit come down in the midst of them lord y'all let your mighty spirit come down god in the midst of them lord god let your spirit come down and let your spirit touch them yay tonight lord let your spirit move upon them god in a great and a mighty way lord lord the devil wants to distract us the enemy wants to separate us the enemy wants our children but the enemy is not going to have our children because i believe they're going to heed the word of god tonight lord touch us oh god help us to be one in jesus wonderful name we pray amen and amen