Revival Vision

amen acts 2 and 38 i want to speak to you today on the subject of revival vision turn to somebody next to you say revival vision revival vision book acts chapter 2 and verse 38 peter said unto them repent and be baptized every one of you in the name of jesus christ for the remission of sins the bible says you shall receive the gift of the holy ghost we are to repent we are to be baptized and we are to let god fill us with his spirit if you have never been baptized before like pastor said we have a baptismal tank just for you today we got robes we got towels what would stop you from getting baptized the right way today if you'll go down in that water god will wash away every sin that you have ever committed it'd be the best decision you've ever made in your life and i believe that god wants to fill every last person with the gift of the holy ghost so before you leave at some point you're going to throw your hands in the air and lift your voice in worship and god will fill you i believe if you've never done it yet today's the day you're going to speak in tongues as the spirit of the lord moves over your heart and life [Music] thank you jesus if you put your bibles down and lift your hands to the lord one more time today lord we love you we lift you up we thank you for what you're doing in this place i pray that you would anoint me lord for the next few minutes that you administer to your people go beyond and do beyond what i could ever plan do or arrange the lord let your kingdom come and your will be done heal somebody feel somebody change somebody's life in jesus name we pray let's give the lord a hand clap of praise [Applause] you may be seated thank you for standing and worshiping the lord today amen it feels so good in this place thank you jesus amen amen revival vision i want to talk a little bit about revival vision amen and as a premise let me just give us some definitions the uh if you were to look it up as i did in the most spiritual way possible by asking brother google this is what vision means vision means it pulls up the oxford dictionary and uh vision really has two definitions the first of which is your capacity to see that is your eyesight you go to the doctor have your vision checked right we all understand that but what i'm going to be predominantly speaking about today is more of our second definition of vision and that is our ability to think about to plan the future it is our foresight it is our capacity to see what could be beyond today is that okay all right now at some point this is my belief every person will need to get a vision from god you need clear and profound life changing earth shattering vision from god for your spiritual walk you need to believe that god is doing something in your tomorrow you need to believe he has a plan he has a will he has a destiny he has a desire you need to believe for something bigger greater deeper higher than you're in today amen god wants to give vision to every last person i believe that today i want a vision for my walk with god i want a vision for my ministry i want a vision for my family i want a vision for my church i want a vision for my city i want to be shaken by and defined by motivated by and possessed by a vision from the lord i want a vision so strong in our churches and in our ranks that if you were to inquire of any member of us you would hear the same vision from us the vision that you hear from the usher from the greeter from the sunday school teacher from the youth leader ought to be the same vision from the pastor it ought to be a vision of revival a vision of miracle signs and wonders it ought to be a vision of growth come on somebody if you don't have that vision catch that vision today we're not staying where we're at come on church this is not as good as it gets don't get me wrong it's lovely it's wonderful it's beautiful but god has a vision even greater [Applause] vision is nothing that should be new to us a secular sphere i would ask that question what dentist lawyer doctor businessman have you looked at and thought wow they got there on accident they rolled out of bed one day and somebody handed them the keys to a clinic they gave him a briefcase and said go meet the judge today no you recognize that at some point they had a significant vocational vision and they sacrificed hundreds and thousands of hours of dollars they sacrificed years to become who they wanted to be one day and there ought to be such a vision in the church that it motivates us to spend our hours our days our energy our effort our time our finances that we might become something bigger greater stronger than we are today begs the question of a christian what is the vision spiritually that we could be so given to as others are given to visions for their own earnings visions of their own careers and etc what is our spiritual vision what preoccupation of my spirit do i have that i'm so fixated on that it's become the focus of my every effort my every hope my every dream my every ambition what do i talk about in my home what do we plan for and dream about and speak of night and day what spiritual aim is it that we set ourselves on that we are gladly sacrificing all that we are to obtain friend we must have and possess and be defined by a vision what would we live for what would we die for what is the goal that we will accept nothing less than there has to be a vision how jesus offered a vision to his disciples he was teaching them to develop this in john 4 and 35 in red letters you may have it he said this say not ye there are yet four months and then comes the harvest behold i say unto you lift up your eyes and look on the fields for they are white already to harvest i don't really know who is in his audience but i would speculate that if he said that he had people that weren't looking at the field and they had no recognition that there was a harvest before them or else he would not have said the statement and so in that short statement he deals with every other competing ideology you might have your eyes here where i live what i'm going through what my problems are and he says now lift up your eyes there is a harvest get a vision that's bigger than you that's bigger than where you live that's bigger than what you can do that's bigger than your ability that's bigger than your sin that's bigger than your problem get a vision somebody [Applause] it was so pressing so urgent so serious open your eyes you know his whole audience had their eyes open lift them up and look he tries to wake him up he gives persuasion compels them it's urgent it's serious get a vision get a vision and it's almost like in that one sentence he just couldn't he couldn't get them to connect the dots don't you understand why i live the way i do don't you understand why i do what i do why i came to this earth while i'll die on this earth i am possessed with a vision of reaching and saving helping and restoring every last one of you and if you call yourself a follower of me you have got to catch what i'm infected with you've got to get this vision you've got to live as i live think as i think and see as i see what if we had a vision for this church and a vision for this city as i looked over the demographics this morning this is what again brother google told me that atlanta had a 2020 population of 514 000 people in the close-knit area here but the greater metro vicinity is 5.6 million souls making it the ninth largest city area in the united states poverty rate as high as 20 percent which is startlingly high it was home to one of the largest lgbt populations per capita 4.2 percent the second largest majority black metro area in the country it's projected that metro atlanta's population can reach over 8 million in just a few years it is more diverse in atlanta than over the entire united states national averages with the african-american population just shot just shy of 50 percent whites at 40 asian 4.8 two or more races three and change other races native american pacific islanders is all this incredibly diverse when i hear numbers like that how can i not look out the window and get a vision for revival how can there be a half million people in my backyard and not see a thousand saved in a year how can there be 5.6 million and us not have daughter works and daughter works and daughter works and daughter works so that scripture screams at me like it must have at them lift up your eyes and look on the fields for their white all ready to harvest braid and liquid lift up your eyes and look get out of your busyness get out of your money-making get out of your schemes get out of your identity get out of your right get out of your routine get out of your traditions and look at my field catch my vision i i uh want to expedite this next little bit here but there's a passage in second kings chapter six and one in genesis 28 with a two different visions in scripture and the second kings uh chapter six elisha the prophet the man of god he's there with his servant and he gets surrounded by an arm an adverse army uh chariots horses all kinds are scary and the servant starts freaking out and he says what are we supposed to do master we're surrounded on every side elisha says no no you don't understand and he prays lord open his eyes and as he prays lord open his eyes all of a sudden the servant standing with the preacher looks up and the soldiers didn't go nowhere but he can now see the host of heaven that surrounds elisha there are more for them now than against them now it's clear god was always in this he was always with us he was always working i just didn't have the vision so i read that and it stands out to me of what god was showing the servant wasn't what could surround you what could help you god just opened his eyes so he could see what god is already doing and it made me think we sit in the midst of an unjust world we sit in the middle of problems and persecutions and sin we feel small we feel defeated we feel persecuted we think we're outnumbered we think we can't do it but god says if you could ever catch my vision i'm already with you i'm already doing it i'm already bringing revival i'm already bringing a multitude i'm already working on them speaking to them preparing away changing the circumstance you just need to see what i see [Applause] genesis 28 jacob had a vision he goes to bed on a rock dude could sleep anywhere he probably has sleep apnea he lays down on rock goes to sleep as he goes to sleep he sees angels ascending and descending god wasn't showing jacob what could be these angels could surround you he unlocked him to be able to see what god's already doing in his midst what am i trying to say if you knew what god was doing today i am telling you every fear would be gone every doubt would be dead every despair would be dismissed you would know without a shadow of a doubt that god can god will god's able [Applause] yeah come on somebody it's not theoretical it's actual it's not something that might be coming it's here it's not something god can do he is doing he's already working he's already to the north of us the south of us the east of us the west of us he's waking somebody up with a dream tonight he's giving somebody a daytime vision today he's convicting somebody now come on he's moving i felt so impressed to share my just bizarre inner workings of my mind this illustration i couldn't get out of my head i i had at one point preached on this other uh painting and so i think about it all the time i would love to see it one day but it's called the salvador mundi has anybody heard of that weird one salvador mundi was a lost work of leonardo da vinci and they found it like years later and attributed to him most expensive painting ever sold like we're talking like a lot of money like half a billion or something crazy and it's on display in like dubai it's a picture of christ uh that he painted holding a crystal orb like representing the world in his hand but anyways i i think of that picture and at some point when leonardo da vinci sat down to create that picture he sat an entirely blank an entirely worthless canvas with nothing on it and he took an unimpressive near worthless paintbrush and he took an impressive and a near-worthless single color of paint and he placed a single brush stroke on that canvas somebody say well i'm a nothing i'm a nobody i've not been to bible school i'm not a preacher i can't make a difference i can't teach a bible so i can't do this i can't do that leonardo da vinci did not wake up to a masterpiece it started worthless with a single brushstroke it was his job to have the faith to stand at the canvas and continue painting and somewhere along the line between the first and the thousandth of the brush strokes it becomes a masterpiece god is not asking you to be your pastor he's not asking you to be me or any other preacher you may see he's asking you to simply stand at the canvas and to take what you have and do something with it for the lord there's not a one of us that can't start somewhere not a one of us that can't invite one person not a one of us that can't take somebody out to coffee give somebody a ride to church come on somebody you can do something and somewhere between where you start where god will take it will blow your mind that picture ended up like i said being the most valuable painting ever sold in the history of mankind you know but this when we talk about the church it is not our painting it's god's god has an agenda and a goal and a vision all he needs are some painters at the canvas that'll give them all that they have and if you'll stand there god will take control and the little bit that you put in he'll anoint and he'll direct and the end of which will be a revival unlike one that we have ever seen in this place before god's agenda is to grow the church god's agenda is to heal the brokenhearted come on somebody his agenda is to deliver and to save and to get victory we are just the middle man of god's word [Applause] that's okay if you didn't go to bible school i didn't either that's okay if you were raised in church i wasn't either it's okay if you're a nobody from nowhere me too elijah too said peter two kind of paul too in fact all of them too that's okay it's okay to stand at the canvas not really know where you're going but just start somewhere every family member is gonna start lost come on every healing starts with a sickness come on every blessing starts with a problem it's okay you just get to painting you just get a vision you just get to believe in it god will do the rest i i have to tell the story as many places as i can because it is it showcases my lack of spirituality but uh one of the churches which enlarged my vision the most uh was a church in indiana actually and it was a pastor who had just his craziest idea and he involved me in it so i get a call one day and he says brother uh you don't know me i don't know you but i feel impressed that we need to do a tent revival out in indiana is there any chance that you would come out and be involved because i was praying about who to have and i went through the evangelist directory and i prayed over the names and when i saw your name i felt like you're the one that's supposed to come and preach this tent revival and i said back to him i said man you didn't pray over those names you're just being lazy my last name's anderson i'm at the top of the list and you stopped right there i said no no no i want you to come preach this tent revival so i went out he said have you ever preached one i said man has anybody in my generation ever preached one like what are you talking about but i'll do it and so we went out and we had tent revival man 10 revival the weirdest thing you've ever done in your life open air it hot hot like georgia hot like hotlanta hot we had makeshift plywood platform that's blowing every which way as we jump on it platform swaying in the wind bugs landing on you kids dancing the altar dust all over the place my shoes beyond repair i mean it's a deal and uh but 10 revivals weird we get to preach in that first service or second service and and i realized this is i might not look like church as i'm used to but god had a vision here and it's bigger than mine as i got to preach in one of those services it wasn't 10 minutes into the service a lady stood up crazy lady stood up on that side and she said i want to be baptized in jesus name and in the middle of my sermon they took her up and baptized her in jesus name but as she went another followed and another followed and another we baptized 11 people before we even had an altar call man i started messing my mind so we didn't really need the air conditioning we didn't really need the lights we didn't really need the fancy and the presentation again all of which i love calm down that's not what i mean we ought to do it it's great on and on but at the end of the day isn't this really just i'm the uber driver getting you to jesus and if i could ever get you there he does the rest god challenged my vision so we had he called us back for the next event that they were doing and and uh we we get set up on his land which is a really long rectangular strip of land if i remember the number right it's 11 acres long and we're on one side setting up for the event and he asked me says uh brother can i uh borrow your car keys yeah sure uh what are we doing what do you need it for and he basically says i'm gonna take your car and i'm gonna park it at the end of where i want people to finish parking because it's a it's not a parking lot it's a field so they're not going to know unless we mark it with the car where they're supposed to line up and that'll be the end of the line hey whatever so we hop in and he's driving and the dude keeps driving and he keeps driving and he just keeps driving and eventually i'm like bro you drilled us like 11 acres away man we got to walk back and it's like 400 degrees outside he's like bro it's going to mark the end of where they're going to line up sure enough we go to start that event and i look out at that parking lot and my car was the last in the lineup of two rows of cars that stretched the entire distance of that property and we had one over 1 000 first-time guests at that event they just they just had this year's one and this year they had over 4 000 first-time guests on that land all of a sudden 11 acres not going to fit what god is trying to do on it you know i wonder what would happen if somebody got a vision in this place that's bigger than what we've seen before bigger than how we did it last time bigger than come on you know what i'm talking about i'm saying where we gotta bring in our robes from our house from how many we're gonna baptize here because the church doesn't have enough i'm talking about we gotta bring in you know what i'm saying where it's gonna take a few hours to get through them i'm talking about what we're going to pray with so many people up here that we need to buy stock and kleenex you know what i'm saying i want vision bigger than what i've seen bigger than what i've done because i want revival bigger than what i've seen and revival bigger than what we've had [Applause] so i love in acts 9 this vision that ananias gets and this is like a literal spiritual vision i mean god like appears to him and says i'm going to summarize dude you're going to tarsus uh you're going to go find saul of tarsus uh he needs to get the holy ghost and ananias is like lord saul like are you serious he's a bad dude like he'll kill me and god's like go ananias in acts 9 it's starting in uh let's see we're at here 17 in acts 9 and 17 ananias went his way and he entered into the house putting his hands on him and he said brother saul the lord even jesus that appeared unto thee as the way that you came he sent me that you might receive your sight be filled with the holy ghost and immediately there fell from his eyes scales he received his sight arose and was baptized if i was ananias my temptation would be when i get to the door i knock and if you've door knocked you know what this is you knock and you take like four steps back because they might answer with a machete and when they get there you say i i'm so that's when i got started right i'm so sorry for disrupting you sir that's what i would have done master saw if i'm not missing it did you by chance happen to have some sort of vision or be expecting someone today if not that's cool i'll go but ananias got to the door there's no hello he didn't address him as a pharisee as a general as a leader come on he didn't address him with military terms or respect terms when the door opens he says brother so like it's done god is going to heal you now he's going to fill you now i have had a vision and it's the hour and the moment and god did healed him his eyes his vision filled him with the holy ghost he was baptized and he's preaching just a few verses later the sad truth is that if we can't find a vision for revival hell sure can hell has a vision to reach every last family it has a vision to disrupt every marriage it has a vision to entrench every last soul and sin to capture people and anxieties and depressions and confusions hell has a vision to infiltrate the church and it would love even to reduce us to being dry and dead and body sitting of pew warmers to be apathetic christians that really have no power with god and we have no growth we have no anointing we don't have signs wonders and miracles he wants us to be comfortable while entirely devoid of revival he wants us only to be trained for routine and for tradition but be blinded of any vision to do more or to reach for more or to go deeper or to touch god but if you could see the vision god has for the church for your family for every lost loved one for every friend every co-worker every classmate if you saw god's building plan for this sanctuary and this campus if you saw what god had coming down the road for atlanta friend i'm telling you there is revival if there really are 5.6 million people in this greater area do you have any idea how many are ready right now right now if one percent were ready not even that if half of one percent were ready we will need the space and capacity for thousands thousands thousands believe there's low-hanging fruit all over the city all over all workplaces all over our schools i believe there are some ready for healing now ready to be filled now ready to be baptized now i remember when i went through that point that i was asking people how to get baptized and where i need to go and who could do it i wanted it and the first one who would have got to me would have had me at that time you know i'm telling you you already know some of them they cover it up well and conceal it but they go home at night and lay their head on the pillow and know that they are totally and helplessly lost they're waiting for somebody to tell them what to do somebody to tell them where to go and you have the answer i want a vision for revival paul had a vision that resulted in the church of rome peter and john had a vision when they walked by a beggar and said i don't have silver or gold but i see something jesus can do for you right now peter had a vision when he entered into an italian roman soldier's home a race god had never reached the people that had just put jesus on the cross and he began to preach to them and see them all filled with the holy ghost and baptized in jesus name philip had a vision when he was going down the road and heard a eunuch sitting in a chariot and he hopped in and said bro i'll tell you what you're reading about it's jesus and they went down and baptized him in jesus name god has a vision for you today it's bigger than where you live at now it's bigger than what you've ever done before it's bigger than what we've seen god has a vision luke 14 and verse 16 a certain man made a great supper and he called many it's parable and the servants of the father go out and tell the city come for everything's ready some people start making excuses by verse 21 the servant comes and shows the lord these things and the master of the house bible says being angry you'd think he'd be content like man you tried you went you invited some people good job pat on the back let's have some chicken master of the house being angry you know i see i see him sitting at the head of the table and begin to grip begin to grip that chair you don't understand we're not having this meal until there's more people here master the house being angry he said to the servant go out quickly into the streets and the lanes of the city and you bring in here the poor and the maimed and the whole and the blind you can't even pick the ones that you get to exclude bring them all that's the second time he sent him out so then the servant says lord it's done like you commanded and yet there is room this is where we arrive today this is a church i already know i could feel it i would invite any soul i would invite every one of my family members friends i invite anybody here we don't care if you're red yellow black or white we don't care if you smell like cigarettes or alcohol we don't care what you're hooked on we don't care what you've done i don't care if you killed somebody come on hey i don't care if you speak russian i don't care who speaks finnish danish come on this is where we're at so if god came in here today what would he say to us i don't think he'd be angry we're at where we need to be we're not overlooking anybody but the servant said lord it's done as you've commanded and yet there is room i'm just call it out like it is one chair room two chairs that's three room two more i see a stretch of five i see two i see four there's room not much but there's room this is what god would do today this was his third time to them the lord said unto the servant go out into the highways and the byways and compel them to come in that my house may be filled i want you to see god's vision today if i could open your eyes like a light switch i would right now god's vision is that when he comes to the feast everybody's there your mom is there your dad is there your siblings are there your kids are there your grandkids are there the homeless are there the rich are there the government is there our co-workers classmates they're all there every race every truck tongue every tribe every language they're all there and until the house is filled we're not gonna stop i have a just deeply troubling burden and vision for revival one time i had to i actually i um eat doctors like self-diagnose all the time right so you stub your toe you're like no it's not it's not normal it's totally a proncia it's abscessing i'm going to cut it open i'm just going to cut it open i'm not going to wait for this to get i need antibiotics too and so so i literally my mind is so fixated on this that at points i've wondered if i'm like am i like manic or schizo or like am i tr should seriously should i see somebody i cannot stop thinking about revival i stopped my wife one day i said babe you have honestly tell me honestly tell me what do you think about during the day i there was a time i thought about work there was a time i thought about school this time i thought about girls high school remember that was fun uh where i'm at now all day long i think about revive all day long i think about another strategy another outreach another plan how to refine it how to hone it i'll call churches that i've been to the last six months ago and say how's it going how can i help how can we see more i am fixated on the idea of revival i have a vision i have a vision man this so crazy tent revival pastor who just texts me who he he man he got in my head and he said this one sentence that just ruined me he said bro we've had you preach and he's like you're all right but when you're in that tent he's like it's like you were born for that he's like bro when you're on the street you're working for with somebody new you're praying with somebody at the altar you're in that tent it's like you were born for that he's like you have got to run with it and you got to take it wherever anybody will have you and i'm like that just messed me up so i bought a tent [Applause] i bought a tent that seats 250 people it's a 40 by 100 and as i'm buying that tent which was an ordeal i i'm praying and i'm like god you know is this am i just you know getting too excited again and i should scale it back and as i'm praying about it all of a sudden this number hits me in my head a thousand a thousand a thousand i sat down and i was telling it to another pastor this is what i'm doing he looked me right in the face and he said brother anderson 10 to 250 110 250 that's your story he said that is absolutely not big enough for what god is going to do and there's that number in the back of my head again a thousand a thousand so i called the tent company and i said i don't know if anybody's ever put in an order for this but i am going to have a 1 000 soul revival in a tent and i need a second tent and it needs to be a lot bigger so i've just bought a 1300 person tent it's almost 10 000 square feet and i am believing that god is going to give us a thousand soul revival friend i don't know what your vision is it doesn't need to look like mine but i want it to be bigger i want you to believe god could do more and higher and deeper god is continuing to enlarge just my faith and my vision we were we were in one service and uh in in one service we were in we had done outreach this individual didn't come from our in-person outreach we had ran some facebook ads and he reached out back on facebook and i was messaging back and forth with him and he asked do we have a uh asl sign language interpreter and i said yeah we i asked and they said yes good and so i said yeah man come on and so he came and he came and he was blind in one eye and deaf in both ears from birth so that whole service he sat over on this side that whole service he had to get the message through the sign language interpreter through really one eye and he from that experience he had enough faith and enough hunger that he raised his hands and indicated he wanted to be baptized he came over he's baptized in jesus name and they called me after we had left and they said bro remember you prayed for that guy and all that stuff and said yeah and they said by the time he made it to his home at night god opened his ears and he could hear for the very first time in his life friend what is your vision of what god could do i see the text now it says to baptize today awesome uh we were in church and this pastor told me a few months before i loved i love this story this is this is god's stuff he had told me a few months before he called me said man i'm going crazy over this lady that is driving me up the wall like what's she doing man who is she he said she never even been to the church but she decided to get online and just trash us so she's leaving like yelp reviews facebook and all over google and all that she's never even been there she's telling everybody that i am some crazy pro vaccine guy and i'm paying people a hundred dollars to get the vaccine through the church he's like you know me you know i don't have a hundred dollars she had never even been here man and for months he was slandering the church for no reason never met him he never did anything wrong to her and uh anyways as time would go on he he called later said it's been a little while we haven't had anybody get the holy ghost could you come and have a special and say yeah yeah sure so we come and we're having a holy ghost crusade service and people come up front and they're getting the holy ghost and uh of all the ones he wanted to get the holy ghost i think he told me they all got it but what i was the most impressed with is somehow that queen bee comes through the back doors of the church and marches herself up front and god fills her with the holy ghost man i i want vision for god to just do wild stuff man we were in one service in in a crazy tent and we just had this bizarre idea that we were going to pray for healing and we set out chairs and uh flipped around backwards like would be facing you set them out across the front and just a few and we said we're gonna set these chairs out don't nobody come up here for headache or back pain go take some excedrin if if you have a real legitimate significant problem in your body we want you to come sit up in this chairs and we're going to come down the line me pastor everybody we're going to pray for you and only if you feel certain that god has healed you can you stand out of that chair and make space for somebody else to sit down we went to that first person i remember that pastor laid hands on that first person elderly gentleman and he shot up onto his feet and took off screaming and running around that tent and as he went and the pastor went down the line and prayed for every single person all of those chairs were emptied out one by one by one by one friend we have got to enlarge what we believe that god can do it's for everybody we baptize people i baptize people that were so drunk i am not sure if this baptism counts i'm not even sure if you're making this choice right now i did it i did it twice but you said yes and i would rather just give it a shot and if we need to repeat it later cool and i'm telling you man we have had people drunk as a skunk can't even hardly talk but yes and no go down in that water and come up instantly sober and entirely delivered from alcoholism in a moment we've seen heroin addicts delivered we've seen smokers that left their cigarettes on the altar and walked out and never had another craving again and i baptized man i baptized nurse practitioners i've invited my patients to come out to crusades that are by their homes and stuff like that and we've prayed patience through the holy ghost i brought hospital administrators to church with me and one of these services recently we had three doctors there that we had invited i'm believing and having a vision of a revival unlike one that we have ever seen before i want it in every home i want it in every city i want it in every church and i want it in every life i truly believe this is the greatest era that we have ever seen or lived in i told this before and i'll say it again in over 15 years of outreach based ministering i have never seen as much effectiveness as we are seeing now i'm telling you i see it in the north i see it in the south i see it on the west coast and the east coast god is doing something now if you stand together with me i want a vision somebody say that i want a vision why not here and why not now why not here and why not now so i i i would take way too long i won't give the whole thing don't worry had a timer so i'm watching it and i know when um my son's in service often be like dude if you get bored just stand up and tell me because i know you guys are nice but he's not and so he'll just shut it down i didn't get the privilege being raised in this i i had a great upbringing i'm glad that i was raised by people that believed in god and had semblance of morality prevented me from doing a lot of bad choices but i would go to bed at night and though i was wealthy beyond all reason i mean we had everything we needed wanted and some i would go to bed at night and know that i am hopelessly lost i despised even myself i hated who i was i hated how i acted i hated that every time i tried to break chains of sin i couldn't and i would run back to the same things i i hated what came out of my mouth i hated what ran through my mind i hated it and i wanted to be saved and everywhere that i went and i tried i couldn't find this god of the bible everybody told retold these stories of healing the blind sing again and the deaf hearing again he was entirely absent where are you god i went to every single church in my city every single church except one and finally i gave that last church a try and i was telling pastor as i walked into that room they even begun the service and i walked past the open door of the prayer room i felt more of the glory of god than i had ever felt in my life every hair in my body stood on end i felt presence i felt power i felt a weightiness that's where we use that word glory kavanagh the weightiness in the atmosphere so as a blanket's been pulled over you as the spirit of the lord is descending into the i felt the glory of god and as we began to worship i realized i had arrived at everything i'd ever needed i found the answer to the hole in my heart and the void in my soul i remember the day i got baptized in jesus name and i remember the day that i lifted my hands and i just began to worship and god filled me with the holy ghost and i began to speak in other tongues as the spirit of the lord gave me the words i remember how powerful that was but friend if if you were raised in church and you're used to this and this is the norm for you that's cool but hear me you don't understand what that other side of the fence feels like and if you understood you would realize how agonizing and painful it is you would realize how hungry we are and how much we want this and we would beg plead pay for you to come and tell us where to go and what to do i want you to have a vision of little dudes like me out across this city i knew how to look tough on the outside and make it look like i wasn't cracked and broken but man i would cry myself to bed at night sometimes knowing man i could accept jesus 400 times but i know i'm not changed you don't know how many there are right now they're all around you jesus said you've got to wake up lift up your eyes and look it is white and it's ready