Our Father's House

Ephesians 3 14-15 for this cause I bow my knees unto the father of our Lord Jesus Christ of whom the whole family in Heaven and Earth is named in John 14 Jesus spoke about his father's house in my father's house are many mansions I want to talk about our father's house today God bless you please be seated and thank you for standing for a while as we worshiped and I spoke pretty often when I'm preparing to speak or write I will Google to see if there's any references either secular or spiritual to the theme I'm going to write on and when I Googled my father's house I was surprised to see a song pop up written and performed by Bruce Springsteen I don't really follow the boss but the living in a cave if I didn't know who he was a famous American performer and when we celebrate the Fourth of July Independence Day his song Born in the USA would be played across Fireworks shows in America everywhere so I was curious why spring Springsteen wrote a song about his dad it's a pretty sad song it's pretty laid back it's pretty much an acoustic guitar and he's singing and Don't Judge Me by the way for listening to Bruce Springsteen but in the middle of the song This is the version that I first found he he pauses and he starts talking about his dad and I I listened to it over and over I typed it up word for word he said now those whose love we wanted but didn't get we emulate them it's the only way we have in our power to get the closeness and love we needed and desire later he says and all we know about manhood is what we have seen and what we have learned from our fathers and my father he said was my hero and my greatest foe it's like a dagger to me when I heard him say my greatest foe he said for years my dad sat at the kitchen table unreachable and when I was too young and too stupid to understand it was his depression so I've read several things about Bruce Springsteen his relationship with his father his father worked in factories he was angry all the time he was depressed often drank and Bruce Springsteen wanted the love of his father and his father's own dysfunction created the dysfunction of a home after his father passed away he dreamed of his dad and dreamed his dad was at one of his concerts and he went back to where his dad was and he said dad you see that guy up there that's on fire he said that's you you know you and me it's a sad story to me and Springsteen's story of being raised by a disconnected depressed dad an Angry Dad could be retold millions of times by men and women who share similar childhoods my dad would have related to this kind of a troubled upbringing my dad was raised in a home or his Unfaithful dad gambled and I did not even remember this until a few weeks ago my sister and I were talking that my paternal grandfather beat my grandmother he beat her so badly one time that she could not move she later had to go live with her parents or her dad told her he made your bed so lie in it go back and live with him that was not good advice they later divorced and much of my dad and my uncle Jack's life they spent being raised by a single mom but today I want to thank God the salvation by Jesus Christ changed the story for my dad and for my family amen [Applause] when I say for I am not ashamed of the gospel of Christ for it is the power of God unto salvation our family is a testimony of a power that changed the trajectory of a life and rewrote a family history thank God for the power that is in the name of Jesus Christ amen it gives me tremendous hope as a pastor to know what a difference Jesus made in the life of my dad his repentance from sins his baptism and water in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ being filled with the gift of the Holy Ghost and after being born again my dad lived a new life a different life and our family my kids and grandkids are blessed and my siblings and their kids and grandkids are blessed because God changed the trajectory of his life every one of us in this room everyone watching online we know that we are shaped by the environment in which we are raised but we are not a prisoner and we are not predestined to repeat the cycles of the past you do not have to repeat the sins of the past you can break the cycles that have produced Who You Are no matter what age you are my dad was not a little Sunday school boy when he found the Lord he was out of the Navy in his early twenties when he came to God and he found in the church mentors that helped him learn how to be a husband and a father now you don't have to look very far to find compelling statistics and stories to support the truth that we desperately need our fathers and I am not implying or proposing that we need fathers more than we need our mothers but the void in our cultures is largely because of deadbeat dads absent fathers and homes that are fatherless the Old Testament closes with an ominous prophecy about the ministry of John the Baptist the Lord said I will send Elijah the prophet before the coming of the great and Dreadful day of the Lord and He the preaching of John the Baptist will turn the heart of the fathers to the children and the Heart of the children to their fathers lest I come and smite the Earth with a curse that was the ministry of John the Baptist he prepared the way of the Lord Jesus Christ it was a preaching of repentance that people would turn to God but what God saw in the prophecy of Malachi the last two verses in the Old Testament is that there must desperately we desperately need a Revival in families we need fathers whose hearts are turned to their children and in response to that children whose hearts are turned to their fathers the consequences are less the Lord would come and Spike the Earth with a curse we desperately need a Family Revival on this Father's Day have chosen to not share the reams of statistics on the effects of fatherless homes we all know stories we have personal examples of fathers who in AWOL absent without leave and all the casualties of fatherless homes or homes where fathers are not engaged the staff support this and it's so desperately needed in our day-to-day I do want to take just a moment though to acknowledge the consequences of a fatherless home increased crime lower education and poor education teenage pregnancy poverty behavioral disorders runaways incarcerations and the stats for incarcerating men and women is incredibly high they come from fatherless homes and unfortunately the consequence of suicide now this the attack of on authority figures in America is well known I want you to pause just a moment to see where we are culturally and I want you to ask yourself if the woke ideology of our day if the deterioration of the nuclear family of the traditional home has advantaged our country has it led to life being better off or has it not undermined the fabric of our country we are a nation to drift and away from God that has rejected the moral fiber and teachings of the Bible and we are paying for it dearly so today I'm rising on this Father's Day to say we need a Revival in our homes we need a Revival that changes the churches of America amen so I'm going to be a little all over the map today intentionally Amen to our wives I want to tell our wives today that your children desperately need to see you obeying the Bible by respecting your husband their father according to a Pew research poll 56 percent of men feel judged by their spouse by how they parent their children so I'm not saying that father is always know best but I am saying that husbands need the support of their wives wives need the support of their husbands when it comes to discipline in the home we need to get back to the biblical order of how God design the home in his wisdom not to harm you or humiliate you but to bless you you need your husband and your children need their father if you undermine him you might find yourself with a lonely job of parenting alone and even if your husband is in the home he may be emotionally absent if his authority is continually undermined so a word for the moms today and I want to say something to to single parents as I alluded to earlier my dad was raised for much of his teen life in a single parent home and on Father's Day I want to make it clear that this church loves and respects the single men and women who are raising their kids to the best of their ability I applaud you I celebrate you I thank God for you we have grandparents raising grandchildren Guardians and foster parents amen and to all of us who are part of the family of God a church can never replace a father or a mother but we can support the families who need the support of functioning homes Amen to strengthen them and to take in people who have been left solitary by circumstances in life because God sets the solitary in families now the church can provide a healthy environment to help there become fully functioning families to husbands and wives who are struggling in your marriage I have a word for you today get right with God and then get right with one another amen I learned years ago that there may not be such a thing as incompatibility maybe just some immaturity and I'm not saying that infidelity is not the deal breaker of many marriages but I'm talking about what may be a spat or a difference don't you know that God Made You distinctly different and you typically marry your opposite so you can complete one another not to compete and if you don't get that then you're always going to be competing and not have marital Harmony in your home so I intentionally say repent apologize forgive bury the past let go of it and start today on Father's Day 2023 and build a home that God design in his word you know that hurting people hurt other people and if you're operating out of the hurt of your past and you've not yet allowed the Lord to heal you then you're going to create dysfunction in the present and for the future so today we have the opportunity of drawing a lion in the sand and say by the grace of God I will forgive I will repent I will apologize we're going to build on a good foundation we may have messed it up in the past but we're not going to let the past shape the future we're starting today it is the first day of the rest of your life today amen [Applause] now let God heal your hurts that God break the cycles that are breaking your family do everything possible to restore the health of your family amen God's design for Godly homes was to produce a generation and next generation of godly people Malachi 2 15 in the New Living Translation didn't the Lord make you one with your wife in body and spirit you are his and what does he want Godly children from your union so guard your heart this is written specifically to husbands remain loyal to the wife of your youth for I hate divorce says the Lord the god of Israel to divorce your wife that this shows on the husband's side of walking away sometimes the wife will walk away in infidelity but to divorce your wife is to overwhelm her with cruelty says the Lord of Heaven's armies so guard your heart to not be unfaithful to your wife the Lord said the purpose of marriages is to produce children that will grow up to be Godly that is what God desires in his father's house the a church the church is the family of God and much is written about the family of God in the Bible in our text I read from you for you A Prayer of pause for the Ephesian Christians for this cause I bow my knees unto the father of our Lord Jesus Christ of whom the whole family in Heaven and Earth is named God is our heavenly father and the church is a family of God this prayer in Ephesians 3 is that the family of God would be filled with all the fullness of God that we would know love in every aspect of its Dimension that we would be strengthened with might by God's spirit in our Inner Man and in order to attain that Paul said that God is able to do exceeding abundantly above all that we can ask or think according to the power that works in us now I've noticed that the principles that govern the church also guide and govern the home and there you know God formed the family before he formed the church but they were both in his mind before the foundation of the world the Dynamics of a healthy home mirror healthy churches and you might ask which came first the chicken or the egg I mean the home or the church well it doesn't really matter because God designed both the church was in the mind of God because Jesus Christ was the lamb slain from the foundation of the world this was in the mind of God so when we say family of God and family we're talking about very related institutions or entities the family of God and your family and they are both so very important unhealthy churches lead to unhealthy homes and unhealthy homes can only be healed by the power of God in the church now I've thought before and taught before God created the home before he created the church but it is the principles of the Bible that are taught in churches that help develop healthiness in the home so I would say that the church has precedented in priority because it is foundational and creating healthy homes we're not going to try to say which is most most important they're both vitally important but the church is a resource upon which a healthy home can be built amen now it occurred to me as I prepared for this message you know the Bible is an amazing book and Truth just continues to take on New Dimensions that the Bible seems seamlessly toggles between the church and the home in the same passages so we'll drill down into a couple verses later but but for now Ephesians chapter 5 just just follow along and I want you to see church and home how God weaves them together in teachings for us why submit yourselves unto your own husbands as unto the Lord home and the church for the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church and he is the savior of the body the church and the home in the same verse verse 24 therefore as the church is subject unto Christ so let the wise be to their own husbands in everything we're going to learn how to function in a home by how the Bible said we are to function in the church the church and the home seamlessly woven together in the teachings of scripture husbands love your wives even as Christ also loved the church and gave himself for it here's how Christ loved the church here's how husbands are to love their wives home Church seamlessly woven together that he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of Water by the word that he might present it to himself a glorious church not having spot a wrinkle or any such thing but that it should be holy and without blemish Church then right back to home so all men to love their wives as their own bodies he that loveth his wife loveth himself for no man ever hated his own flesh but nourisheth and cherisheth it even as the Lord the church so home Church the family of God our father's house becomes the model for how to build a Godly home they stand together or they fall apart if you want a dysfunctional home just have a dysfunctional marriage if you want your children to struggle in relationships in their lives make sure they observe you struggling in your relationship as husband and wife and I believe that the greatest gifts that parents can give their children is a healthy marriage and a healthy church so today when I talk about our father's house I'm talking about the model that helps build our house our homes together I want to discuss three important characteristics of a healthy home based on our father's house that in the church and in our homes we need headship structure and safety by headship I'm talking about Jesus Christ who is the head of his church he is in a position of power and authority but it is not abused it is based on sacrifice and serving and loving that's why he earned the right to be the head of this house the church Our Father heads this house with love and discipline but there's a balance between the two well God is the head of the church he's also at the Helm of the church he is over it but he also guides it and gives us principles whereby we should live our lives he's in Authority but he doesn't abuse that Authority and as I mentioned it is balanced and God always gives us balancing principles to keep everyone in their right place and keep our homes and lives functionally functioning the way he designed them to be Ephesians 5 22. here's for the wives wives submit yourselves into your own husbands as unto the Lord now and there is a book written called love and respect and respect is a lot nicer word than submission but the Bible is what it is and remember not written for your hurt but written for your blessing so husbands could read Ephesians 5 22 and go on an eagle tree ego trip until they get to verse 25. husbands love your wives even as Christ also loved the church and gave himself for it balancing principles if you're in Authority you better earned a Authority by loving and leading sacrificially Colossians 3 18 is a parallel passage and then in the Bible we have these instructions about children that are taught to obey their parents and then fathers are taught to not be heavy-handed in the way they discipline their children Ephesians 6 and Colossians 3 I'll show Colossians on the screen but Ephesians 6 and 1. children obey your parents and the Lord for this is right honor thy father and mother which is the first commandment with promise that it may be well with thee and thou mayest live long on the earth and then he balances it and you fathers provoke not your children to wrath but bring them up in the nurture and the admonition of the Lord so Colossians 3 20 21 same idea children obey your parents at all things for this is well pleasing unto the Lord and parents can shout and pound the pulpit with Colossians 3 and 20 until they read the next verse the balancing principle fathers provoke not your children to anger lest they be discouraged think of how many depressed discouraged people live in our culture because they have never had a healthy relationship with their father a healthy family dynamic creates a relational environment for healthy structure in our father's house and that's my next point headship and structure structure is really important amen you're not an amoeba you're not a blob floating around God design the universe with structure and the church and the home with structure if you live in a physical house he knows probably not thrown together There Was An Architect and there was a builder he followed that set of plans now I know it's great to have pretty paint and a wonderful interior design and beautiful flooring and finishes and appliances but as nice as that might look they are nothing if you don't have a solid infrastructure so houses are built good houses on a good foundation quality framing matters the electrical and plumbing is not that romantic but it's pretty important the roof over your head it's really important right so I want to make sure that our home is sound from the roof to the bottom because whatever goes on in that house needs a support structurally and a family is the same amen you may want your family to look pretty and appear pretty to everyone but I want to make sure that your families have the spiritual structure that is based on the Bible to stand the test of time and resist the storms that will attack your family there are over a hundred decisions that you make and building a home and in life there are thousands of decisions but you need to go back to the blueprint that God gave us to know how to build a home that will stand amen no I'm I'm on social media but I really don't have a lot of time for that and just seems like more work to me but I want to ask you this or let you think about this if the image that you project on social media does not mirror the healthy relationships that you have at home then you need to get your priorities right get your home right first Jesus spoke about people who wanted the praise of men more than the praise of God wouldn't it be better for God to honor your home and to bless you than just to have the appearance of something that's not real it's a lot easier to post something that looks good than to do the hard work of making it really good in reality now I'm not telling you to not post I'm just saying make sure that there's not duplicity between what you post and what really goes on I'm not telling you that you want to post the worst thing that happens in your home I'm just saying let's make the home the priority not the facade or the appearance but not the real substance of what makes it great Amen in the same way that children thrive in an environment of order Believers grow as disciples where there are spiritual disciplines practice home Church seamlessly toggle I'm doing that today on purpose Jesus said that if you're going to follow him you need to take up your cross daily he wanted our lives to have discipline and structure and healthy homes have structure and then some spontaneity as well amen you don't want to just be over balanced to be rigid and have no fun but I thank God that in this house it's not just about rules it's about a relationship and because there is love there is structure to protect our children and our homes from the attack that are trying attacks that are trying to undermine it our heavenly father loves us unconditionally he adopts spiritual orphans he has no limit on how many kids can be in his family I know you don't feel that way about yours there's gotta we've got to stop that's all that's that's it 1.8 children that's all we can afford I mean you're coming into the family of God you find a place of incredible love and belonging but in this house you can't say that because God loves us so much that he doesn't care how we live or conduct ourselves I I remembered a story that Jesus told about a man who invited people to a wedding and the invited guest refused to come so they went out and invited everybody they could get to show up so it's called come one come all come as you are but when you get inside the wedding Feast there was an expectation that you had to put on a wedding garment you had to change once you got in the house there were expectations there was structure and the man that was throwing this wedding Feast saw a man in that piece without a wedding garment on and put him out of the house so I just want you to understand that while we want to be loving you need to be careful as a parent that you're not just trying to be a buddy or a friend driven by your own insecurity you're the parent God placed you there to give oversight and structure In My Father's House and in yours the Bible says things like let everything be done decently and in order Paul to Timothy a guy raised without a Godly father Timothy you need to know how to behave yourself in the house of God the Living God the pillar in the ground of truth I don't think he was just talking about Timothy don't run in church and when you're in Chip's class don't drive your teachers crazy we do have some discipline issues we need to work on at Atlanta West with our wonderful amazing children but how to conduct yourself relationally in the house of God Paul wrote to Timothy and he said if you've got older men in your life don't rebuke an elder but entreat him as a father if they're older women in the church I want you to treat them like mothers do you see how the relationships of a home and the relationships of the church are very similar and we learn how to function in home and the church because they're both super important he said I want you to treat the younger men like brothers or maybe even better I want you to treat the younger women like sisters in all Purity and Romans said if at all possible as much as lieth in you live peaceably with all men in our father's house we have instructions about how to reconcile with a brother or sister when there is a conflict we do it according to the Bible their expectations in our father's house better character and our conduct we are to cleanse ourselves from all filthiness of the Flesh and spirit to perfect Holiness and the fear of God in a family the purpose of discipline is not just to prove who is the boss that's not the goal of discipline but it's to raise a Godly child amen so we understand the teachings of the scripture about discipline that helps children grow into responsible adults in our father's house women are taught to guide the home fathers are taught to rule their own house well but it rule the word there is to to stand before to lead to manage it is a serving role but it accomplished accompanied with or by Authority amen fathers play a key role in the lives of their children and should be actively involved in them I'm on this point about structure and I told you I'm going to meander just a little bit about structure and involvement you you need to spend time with your children amen and you should help develop them into their fullest potential for the glory of God now the Bible said that God created everything for his own pleasure so our children we raise our children not for our pleasure or for their pleasure but for his pleasure I'm not trying to raise my children to live out my unfulfilled dreams in their lives not trying to vicariously live out my ambitions through them but to help cultivate what God created them to be so they can be their best to the glory of God so because of that I want to understand their nature so I can know how to nurture them I'm not trying to change their nature I'm trying to cultivate it I'm trying to correct bad behaviors trying to make sure that they are Godly law-abiding citizens that function and healthy relationships but I want them to play to their strengths the way God created them I want to help break bad relational habits and personal habits but I want them to be what God designed them to be not forcing them to pursue your agenda in their lives I mentioned spending time there was a myth years ago you know like the one minute manager and the one minute parent that just spend a meaningful minute with your kids well the meaningful minute is Meaningful but it needs to be meaningful minutes and hours quantity time because I'm busy yes I know you're busy but you know it's like investing if you'll invest up front the dividends come paying off later and if you invest the time up front they pay off later relationally and in Godly children that you raise I got a really great Father's Day card from a family in our church and in the front cover says there are no shortcuts to being a good dad it's a full-time full-on effort without timeouts or stand-ins what makes the difference wisdom patience love and lots of Grace from above God's provision for each and every need when kids Thrive under a father's care they are a blessing to behold I thank God for the dads in this church who are involved who are present who are fully engaged you know I created this little one-liner for myself years ago to be where you're at when you're there and I made it just like that in a silly form to remind myself because I can be distracted and the more we go in life you can be in a room with people that you love and should be spending time with and you are somewhere else by preaching against cell phones I'm preaching against distractions and by the way face to face is harder requires more of us but it's what shapes us amen well I think I've just kind of made that point so I'll just move right on talk about today help them with their homework take an interest in the things that interest them you know when your kids are little this this is with our boys and people I've observed whatever dad is into there kind of think is cool when dad comes home dad's home is the greatest thing in the world but as your kids grow into their teenage years I learned from my uncle Alan that I should get involved in what interests them even though it may take a little effort on my part to get interested in what interests them so we can spend time together so I can help shape their future I think it's good to help them experience wholesome activities that they enjoy we're talking about the structure in a home get them involved in church activities in camps and North American youth congress as much as possible make sure that they have spiritual experiences that will shape their life for eternity amen My Brother David and I talked about the importance of trying to have well-rounded exposures they may not like everything that they get to be involved with to try to see if that fits them or not but you want them to be a little bit well-rounded so they relate to other people and are not just kind of one lane people and then and I will tell you that I learned this from my mom and I learned this from my wife my dad did this too if my brother's dad and I or my brothers we'd come back from a fishing trip my mom was outside with her camera taking a million pictures helping us cook that fish he was right in the middle of that she took an interest in US my wife is amazing at creating wonderful memories I'm that guy I'm task driven I'm thinking about the very next thing she's all about making this the most fun time possible we had so many vacations and she lived behind you know like a a video camera whatever camcorder video and I said we're on vacation she's like video in every minute of that but now Ryan made her own little family YouTube channel nobody cares about it but my boys and us the daughters at all put up with it grandkids think it's pretty cool to see their dad in those little uh jams that mamaw made didn't that look hilarious we made a memory my wife made memories we made sure that we did that and I'm not bragging or patting myself or ourselves on the back we just learned that making memories is so important and it takes time I'm a pastor and I'm a pretty busy guy and it's easy for me to always be thinking about that one lost sheep but I can tell you the sheep that matter the most to me are the sheep that God gave me as I priority relationships in my life my wife our children our grandchildren I love you but I my primary responsibility is to them I know work is important other people are important but your family God Made You the steward of your family as a father and it is so very important thank you talking about structure all three parts of this sermon are not equal structure you know what else what about being vitally connected to the church where faithfulness is really what faithfulness means I grew up in a Saints home and faithfulness meant we went to church every time the doors were open we didn't decide every Wednesday or Sunday if we were going to church or not my parents made a decision to be faithful working people and faithful meant you just went to church and you didn't decide at six o'clock on Wednesday night or at 8 30 on Sunday morning whether or not you're going to church mom made sure the clothes were laid out on Saturday night so Sunday wasn't so frantic for us and you just did that and the results of that pay off not because they did anything special just because they were faithful and they got connected to church and they got connected to church in Ministry and served there so we grew up knowing that this is what you do you're faithful you find your place in the body of Christ and you make a difference in the lives of people by loving them by taking into church by being kind to them by bringing them into your family when they don't have a family in their in you know in the church in their life like Rocky and him and others that my family brought in because my parents made Church important and they had that structure headship structure and safety the family of God our father's house is built on an unshakable Foundation that can never be destroyed I know that families can be destroyed because of the human failure in those families but the family of God is destined for eternity I know that the church is made up of imperfect people like you and me and we live with the real while striving for the ideal but I'm going to tell you that our father's house is predestined to be saved and if we stay in this father's house we are part of that promise amen I know our world is going crazy but stay in the church this is a place of spiritual and eternal safety we've received a kingdom that cannot be moved and our God has all power in heaven and in Earth he's never lost a battle and he never will this is a place of shelter Where We Gather abiding under the shadow of our almighty God for strength and beauty are in his sanctuary and as Jesus said those that belong to him no man can ever plucked him out of his hands we do not believe the doctrine of unconditional eternal security you can be disinherited if you walk away from the father's house but from God's perspective when he saved you he will not walk away from you and no one can cause you to fail him amen Life Death principalities power things present things to come nothing can separate us from the love of God which is in Christ Jesus our lord we are part of a place of spiritual and eternal safety our father's house there's a safe house [Applause] I'd like to say that healthy churches are made up of healthy homes and I know that that can be true but I'm placing the priority today I'm changing the way I address this that the church is first and it builds healthy homes and then the healthy homes build healthy churches and they're reciprocal right both bless one another but we have come to the thing that matters most that changes our eternity and that is the church amen a father's house is a safe and what I love about our father's house is it's a place where you can come with all of your faults and all of your failures everything you've felt guilty about while I've been preaching today and you can find forgiveness here in our father's house our father's house is a place where prodigals can come home and be restored to a relationship with their Heavenly Father her father's house is a place where quitters make a comeback like John Mark who defected from a missions trip but became profitable to Paul in the ministry my father's house the church where I grew up it's a place of approval or you can hear your heavenly father say this is my beloved Son this is my beloved daughter in whom I am well pleased and there are lots of people in our world have never heard a father say that they're raising homes by dysfunctional fathers and mothers like the boss like Bruce Springsteen he didn't have the power to overcome his own demons be the kind of father his son needed the best I understand from knowing him perpetuated to the Next Generation same struggles same aloofness perpetuated because there was no intervention from a Heavenly Father he said hey your dad never said he loved you I love you your dad was never there for you I'll be there for you I will never leave you and I will never forsake you you felt like you can never be good enough he never heard him say Well pleased come to my father's house or you can find acceptance and belonging and unconditional love that will change you change your family change your eternity if you're able would you please stand right now headship structure safety if you're lost you can be found in our father's house if you've been abandoned we would love to adopt you and our heavenly father will adopt you into the family of God if you have been estranged from the Lord by your sins you can be reconciled by repenting today starting the process leading to New Birth it all changed for you today if your family is dysfunctional you can find a healthy home in our father's house that will help you build a home that is built on a Biblical Foundation you are not predestined to repeat the past whom the sun sets free is free indeed and we stand on the scripture of such were some of you but now you're washed now you're Justified now you're Sanctified now you're a new creation in Christ Jesus all things are passed away and all things are made new and it all starts today