What Does Biblical Modesty Look Like?

Summary

Summary prepared by Acts 2:38 Life from the transcript below — the preacher’s words follow in full.

The passage read — and the principle binds men and women alike

• The host's frame, carried from the verbatim layer: the subject is a very important scriptural principle — modesty. The host names the guest's two books on holiness, and frames the tradition: a holiness movement that has traditionally stressed this biblical virtue. The scripture often cited, found in many documents, is read aloud: in like manner, that the women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with propriety and moderation — not with braided hair, or gold, or pearls, or costly clothing — but, which is proper for women professing godliness, with good works. The question: what does modesty look like in the world we're living in today? How do we apply it to our lives?
• Let me focus on modesty, but also make some general observations. The passage you just read: go back one verse, to verse 8. There Paul first addresses the men — he addresses common temptations that men have to struggle with — and then he says, in like manner also, and addresses common temptations that women face. In this way it's not denigrating women. It's the objective fact that culture has higher expectations on women's appearance — and you can argue that's really more men's fault, because they are visually oriented and try to put their expectations on women. Paul makes a gender distinction: he addresses males and females knowing we're not identical. We're equal in God's sight, equal in value — in society, in the home, in the marriage — but we're not the same. And so he addresses different temptations, as a generalization, first to men, then to women.
• But I hasten to add: the principle is the same. If he says, men, avoid wrath and doubting — well, if a woman is full of wrath and doubt, she should avoid that as well. And then he says, women, be sure to dress modestly — well, if a man is immodest, he should also heed the same thing. So it's not exclusive; it's not as if we have rules only for women. Some people will say it's really the culture that has put more expectations on the woman — which makes a woman who's trying to follow the scripture look more easily distinct than a man. Well, that's a problem with our culture. It's not that we're denigrating women, or putting more restrictions on women: it's that our culture has treated men and women unequally. Actually, I would argue we need to treat them equally. Modesty applies to the man as well as the woman. It really aggravates me sometimes: I travel, especially in the Middle East, and I will see a man in a t-shirt and shorts, and his wife is fully covered from head to toe with only her eyes exposed — and I think, wait a minute. I can respect a person wanting to be modest, although I think that's far excessive — but what really aggravates me: why is only the woman supposed to be modest? It should be equal.

Scriptures: 1 Timothy 2:9-10; 1 Timothy 2:8

What the word covers: demeanor, speech, and dress

• Modesty in this context: first of all, the root word itself is talking about decent, chaste — not promoting lust of the flesh, which would be the desires of your flesh; lust of the eyes, that attraction of the eyes; pride of life, the ego, the self-will of flaunting yourself. So modesty would mean a decency — basically, covering the body so you're not promoting sexuality or sensuality. And I want to be careful here: I'm not accusing women of causing the problem. If men are lustful, that's their own problem, and I don't blame the woman for that. But I would say both men and women need to be careful.
• To me, modesty is your demeanor, and it's your life. It's how you talk: if you speak in a risque or vulgar fashion — he attributes the prohibition on that to the book he names, in his own paraphrase — that's breaking some barriers that lead somewhere. Our society is guilty of this: joking about things, talking about things, that should only be talked about between a husband and wife — exposing intimate discussions, and secrets, and details that should be talked about, if necessary, in a medical or clinical way, or in an instructional group of men, or a group of women, or between a husband and wife — but not just indiscriminately spoken of. So modesty involves your attitude, your behavior, your speech, and your dress — and it involves both men and women. I think we need to emphasize that.

The first two principles: distinction, and decency

• Now, in this context I find four principles. The first: the principle of distinction between male and female. It's addressed here — women adorn themselves in modest apparel: the apparel is speaking of a long, flowing robe that would be distinctive to women. Even in ancient times — and even today in the Middle East — men's robes and women's robes are distinctive enough that people could tell the difference from a distance. And the Old Testament says there is distinctively masculine clothing that women shouldn't wear, and vice versa — citing Deuteronomy, the number running fused in this telling. So I do find the principle of distinction between male and female — what we sometimes call gender distinction.
• I find, second, the principle of modesty in the sense of decently covering the body — not exposing it for the purpose of flaunting sexuality or inciting lust. While you can say, yes, the onlooker is responsible for guarding his own heart — I fully agree with that — yet at the same time, by our demeanor and our dress, we should not hint, or invite, or say: I'm wanting to expose myself for sexual attention. And to be honest, many times you just read the advertisements: they say, this is sexy, this is sensual — they're not hiding the fact that, yes, we are deliberately trying to create this kind of thinking.
• Now I do want to hasten to say: it says women adorn themselves — to adorn means to decorate. So we're not talking about a woman looking plain, ugly, as simple as possible — no type of decor, no ribbons, no colors, no lace. To the contrary: a woman should want to look attractive; a woman should want to look nice; a woman should fix her hair, and wear clothes that represent her family, her husband, herself, her church well. We're not talking about denigrating, or making the woman as plain as possible. We're just saying: yes, look beautiful, decorate yourself, make yourself attractive — but according to proper guidelines. So if you want to look attractive, and someone looks at you and says: oh, that's a very nice person — that should be the answer. Not: oh, they're a very sensual person, a very sexual person; they're showing private organs, or hinting at private organs, by extremely tight, thin, or skimpy clothes. That means, to me, a woman's dress should not be excessively low cut; I think a woman's basic torso should be covered; her upper limbs should be covered. When I was a pastor, I always encouraged that a woman should wear a dress or skirt that would cover the knee, whether sitting or standing — and if she's worshiping God, shouting, she's still modest.

Scriptures: Deuteronomy 22:5

Culture cannot set the standard by itself — the test, and what Paul feared

• Now, how do you know exactly what is modest? Well, to some extent there is a cultural component. Let's say you're in a culture that has expectations, and if you deliberately violate those, you're making a statement. Even if, objectively, you would say: well, I don't think that's immodest — let's say in Victorian society, for example, or a more conservative society: if you are out of the norm, you are making a statement. Even though objectively you may not be exposing too much, in the context of that culture you're sending a message — and they're getting the message. So there is that culture component. But there also has to be an absolute component, regardless of what the culture says. In our culture, shorts, tank tops, swimming suits, bikinis are all acceptable. But wait a minute: the scripture says modest apparel. Well, if all those things are modest, there is no such thing as immodest apparel — because anything less than that is nothing. So clearly we can't just go by our culture: our culture has to be wrong there, because it has no concept that there's any clothing that is immodest.
• So how do we know what is modest? I think we go back to: is this going to open the door — make us feel like we're projecting, or the onlooker is receiving — the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, the pride of life? I like to say: okay, maybe wearing a bathing suit is commonly accepted today in certain situations — you go to the beach, nobody thinks anything of it; nobody's trying to say I want to commit adultery; they're not saying I want to be immodest. But let's be honest: human nature is the same; human psychology is the same; human physiology — the way the brain works, the eye works, the way the male works, the female works — is the same for generations; it hasn't changed. So if you interview ten guys on the beach and say: what is your impression? — they're not going to say: well, that's a modest person. They're going to say: that appeals to the lust of the eyes. You have to be realistic: it's not just what you intend, but what is actually going on. Even though the culture says it's acceptable — even though maybe Christian churches say acceptable — yet the actual effect is still the same as it always has been.
• Another practical way to look at it: what would God consider to be immodest — what was Paul worried about in his culture? The women there were dressed very modestly compared to us: they all wore robes down to their ankles; they were all covered, their whole bodies basically. What was he worried about? I found that sometimes the women — especially if they're working in the fields, or doing some type of activity that requires exercise or exertion — they would pull their robe up above their knee and tie it up above. Well, that was considered immodest. So probably when Paul says make sure you wear modest clothing, he wasn't saying don't wear a bikini — that wouldn't have even come to his mind; don't wear a miniskirt; don't wear shorts. He would have probably been thinking: you really shouldn't be pulling your robe up above your knee. And we don't think it's just Paul: we think that's the New Testament church; we think that's the will of God. So if the New Testament context would consider something immodest, we would follow that same guidance.

God's own picture of immodesty — moderation, ornament, and the witness of history

• Another example of what God might think: in Isaiah 47, the Lord was bringing judgment — pronouncing judgment upon Babylon, and likening her to a woman that's immodest, immoral, and going to be ashamed. And he reads it: come down, and sit in the dust, O virgin daughter of Babylon; sit on the ground — there's no throne, O daughter of the calans, as the name runs in this telling — for thou shalt no more be called tender and delicate. Take the millstones: you're going to be a slave; grind meal; uncover thy locks; make bare the leg; uncover the thigh; pass over the rivers; thy nakedness shall be uncovered — yea, thy shame shall be seen. God is painting a picture for his people: this is kind of how God looks at it, and how he expects his people to get the message. Here's this woman who's ashamed, her nakedness exposed. Is he talking about her being nude? No — he's talking about her making bare her leg, uncovering her thigh: she's walking across the water, having to pull up her robe, and he says that's nakedness, that's shamefulness, that's judgment. It's a picture of a woman who's disgraced. Well — are we going to wear those clothes and flaunt what God thinks is nakedness and disgrace, while we think it's normal? If you're exposing your whole leg and your thigh, God would say that's immodest; that is a shame. So you do get some indications when you read scripture.
• The other thing: modesty also has the connotation of not extravagant, not showy — and you find here in the text, moderation. So I would say the third principle is moderation: it goes to our whole lifestyle, but also to our dress — that it would be in moderation. And then it also says not to wear ornamental jewelry, in effect — whether it be in your hair: I don't think it's some simple hair arrangement, but elaborate hair arrangement, or maybe even weaving ornaments into the hair, as was commonly done in those days. The women in that culture all had long hair — so it wasn't the fact that they had long hair, that's actually encouraged; it wasn't the fact that they fixed up their hair nicely. It was the fact that they tried to be very extravagant, gaudy, or even wear jewelry in the hair. And so he says: don't wear gold or pearls. I think he's giving an example of precious jewels and precious metals that you should not adorn your body with — jewelry that has, as its only purpose, to draw attention and to be an ornament. So I do see that as avoiding ornamentation — which I would put makeup in the same category. Again, every time makeup is used in the Bible, it's always in a negative connotation: trying to expose yourself, flaunt yourself, attract someone in the wrong way. And although I realize most people today, if they wear jewelry or makeup, or even what we consider immodest clothing, they don't intend that — so I'm not attacking them or condemning them. But I'm just saying: if we really want to follow the Lord, then the teachings of the New Testament are for the church today, and we should follow those four principles.
• And what's very interesting: if you study church history — I explain this, by the way, in the two books he names — Practical Holiness actually examines church history. Shockingly enough for some: the early centuries after the Bible, like the second and third centuries, what I've just explained was the common teaching of all so-called Christians — even stricter than what I'm teaching. And then, when you see revival movements: John Calvin, the father of the Reformed tradition as he styles him, his teaching was very strict on modesty of dress. John Wesley, the Methodist: his teaching was very strict. The whole holiness movement of the nineteenth century: same thing. And the Pentecostal movement of the early twentieth century, by and large, came out of the holiness movement: same thing. So everything I just said would be endorsed by the Reformed and revivalist movements of previous centuries — particularly the Calvinist, the Methodist, the holiness people, and the early Pentecostal movement. Although we're kind of an anomaly today — there are some other groups, but relatively few groups that still would say this is important — actually, when you look at church history, our interpretation of scripture is pretty much the standard and the norm among Bible believers, revivalists, conservative movements. But obviously, at the end of the day, we're not trying to follow even a tradition or a culture; we're trying to follow what the scripture teaches. And I do believe: by actually using the word modesty, it has meaning. The sad thing is, it looks like many Christian groups never even grapple with what that might mean — it's not even taught, or it's a hundred percent subjective, or it's irrelevant as ancient culture. But actually we believe, as apostolics, that we're part of the New Testament church, and the teachings to that church are to us today.

Scriptures: Isaiah 47

Scripture index: 1 Timothy 2:9-10; 1 Timothy 2:8; Deuteronomy 22:5; Isaiah 47.