Reasons Christian Kids Go Wrong

— bunch of stuff that would make it sound like I really knew all the answers. — But I've seen other kids do that too and they don't do it now. — So I don't have a foolproof answer to that. — And unless my children had already been raptured or were in the grave and I really felt — sure that they had made it, then I think maybe I would be more qualified to say — do this or the other. I don't know yet whether what I've done has worked because they've only made it this far. — They haven't made it all the way to the end. — But I think if somehow we can understand that, you know, sometimes we refer like they — say the house of David or well that's not just people that went and came from a dwelling place. But I think that one — day maybe David just sat down with his companion and said — uh we got these kids here, you know, somewhere this mom and dad came together and they said, "Now here are these uh — these kids and they they call us mom and dad or whatever they used to call them back then." And when one refers to the — house of David, uh how are they going to think about that house? — Uh there will be an exceptionally bright boy named Solomon and he'll bungle things from time to — time and he'll build a lot of shoddy memorials to his own memory. — But if somehow we can instill in him a love for the house of God, — then one day sitting somewhere in this proximity, there will be a building that's called — Solomon's Temple, and it'll belong to God. There'll be another little curly-haired boy that runs around the — courtyard, and he's just the doll of everybody. and we'll try, but we might fail. — And then there he is with his hair or head or whatever it was hanging in a tree, you know. But it it it just has kind of — a way when you think of the house of David, unless you kind of got a warped mind, you really don't just think of all of — these mistakes and things because somehow time has a way of covering up the bad and you just remember the good — if you have kind of a normal mind, you know. And um and when I think of David or his household, — I just think of Solomon being the wisest man that ever lived, you know. And I think of David as being a man after — God's own heart for what all the mistakes he did make. But when we are — coming together to build a house and we want God to be the head of that house, we are taking on ourselves some kind of a responsibility. — And in the day that that we live in, I I think that we probably have really taken on some kind of a like my little boy my — boy says, a doozy of a job. We really have got us something on our hands because everybody — wants your kids. — Everybody in the world would love to have your kids as members of their group. — There is not a nightclub in your city, but what would welcome the money that your kids spend? — There's not a dance floor that would be closed to them if they are old enough to dance. When they cease to be a minor, — nobody will shut the bars and say, "No, because you belong to the Euings." Now, don't you come in here. You're not — allowed. No, they'll take their money just like they will anybody else's. — The schools want your children's participation just as much as they do anybody else's. — They just day before yesterday, the coaches just called Vonnie in, she's 15, said, "We'd like for you to be on — the track team." She said, "Well, you know I don't do that." They said, and immediately they had an answer. They — said, "But Vonnie, we'll let you wear a skirt." See, they thought that was the only — thing. They tried to get Landy to play basketball. Said, "We'll let you wear blue jeans to the game. Everybody wants

— your kids, but it just all depends on how much I want them for his kingdom. — How badly do I really want them for his kingdom? — I had a formal dedication at the church with my children just like every other mother and daddy does. I don't think — that constitutes salvation, but I did it. But I had a dedication before I ever got to church. — I went in and knelt down by a little bassinet two different times in a four-year interval. — and gave away to God two little tiny things that were as helpless as could be. — I don't know how successful I will be from now until judgment, but as of this moment, I have not taken them back and claim that they belong to me. — It's just that when we have done our best and all in our power, it's a little better feeling than remembering with — remorse all the times that we didn't try. It isn't that we have a foolproof thing. It's just it just feels better when we try. — Now I know that um we are very uh mistake conscious. — I don't know if mistake and sin is the same thing or not. I don't think it hardly is. Not all the time. — But I remember one time, you know, I told you while ago I really always admired smokers. — Thought that was so neat. So I always wanted to smoke. — And uh nobody in my family smoked cuz my dad is a preacher, you know, and nobody of our friends smoke cuz there's church — members. They weren't going to smoke in front of us if they did. So we hardly ever got to see any. — So we had this cigarette lighter in the car and it was that was so neat because — you didn't have to steal matches. It was just a built-in device there. You just had it, you know. — So, uh, I didn't buy cigarettes. I I had a factory. I made my own. — And, uh, they were fat. They look like cigars, but I made them. So, I was — sitting in the Ford one day and I was sitting up there driving, you know, and I had my doll sitting over here and I — was beating on her cuz I thought that was so cute, you know, people who wing on their kids. — I was just spanking her and and telling just to talk and there wasn't a soul in there but me and her she's deaf — and I was just talking away and um I had me one of my little cigarettes in my mama's purse that she gave me to play — with. If she'd have known it was going to be a cigarette pouch, she wouldn't have given it to me. But I had it. So, I punched in the little cigarette lighter — that was so cool and it got red and and I lit it in this car and now all the — windows rolled up. And here I am. I'm such a good driver, such a good mother. — I'm beating my kid with one hand, driving with the other, and smoking with the third one, I guess. And um I was — sitting up there just puffing away. And a lot of you know sister O'Brien, that's my mother's sister. — She saw me and so she came out to the car and um man, I — just I panicked. I I I just stuffed my cigar up under the seat. I didn't know anything else to do with it. And I — didn't put the fire out. I just put it under the seat. — So she came out there and I was real cool. So I rolled the one down. I said, "Hi." And um the smoke's curling out from the — seat all this time. She said, "Uh, what you doing, baby?" I said, "Oh, I'm just driving, just playing, ladies. Me and my — baby." And she said, "Um, what else you doing?" I said, "Nothing." — I was also gifted in lying. — And she said, "Um, what's that smoke coming out from the seat?" I said, "Oh my lord, daddy's car is going to burn out. What's — wrong and faking?" Like I didn't even know. — And so I said, "What is that?" I mean, you know, I was this intelligent. I knew you had to cover up when you sinned. I — knew that there. You're born with that instinct, you know. And so I started to, you know, pretend again.

— She said, "Look, Joan, I saw you smoking." — Man, Calvary looked good. I I knew I was going to get crucified cuz you don't know my mother. — Wow. — Switches were totally obsolete in her world. She never saw one. She had a wooden spoon. — Not a spoon that's like this. It was a straight spoon with holes in it, you — know. That was for the blood to run through, I guess. — And man, she could use it. I'm not lying. It was unreal. Brother Heron, uh, we were raised together. He can testify to my mother's disciplinary measures. — And, um, she said, "I'll tell you what, Joan said, pull that out from the seat." So I did put the fire out, threw it — away. She said, "If you promise me that you will never do this again, I will not tell V." That's my mother. — Well, I mean, who wouldn't promise? If I had a Bible, I'd have stood on it. I said, "I will never do this again." I — did, but I said I wouldn't. I never would do it again. — Well, you know, all of these things, I guess all this maybe is just a part of being I don't know what it is, a human, I — guess. I've never been inside a picture show, but we were driving past one one time and it it just fascinated me. They didn't have air condition, you know, we — live in this huge city. The population is 2,000 and they had this theater and — the windows were open and I heard some I thought it was an some elephants and I said, "Daddy, what's up in that room?" I — said, "I hear elephants." It was summer night and we had the windows rolled down and he said, "Well, John, that's the — picture show." And I said, "Can I go?" Well, I knew I wasn't supposed to go, — but I thought the elephants were in the room. I I didn't know what it I mean, there wouldn't be any room for those — 2,000 people if the elephants would have been in there, cuz the room was near this big. And he explained to me, you know, that it was on a screen and — whatever. He said and and he was very wise and he he stopped the car — and he said, "John, do you really want to go?" — And in my little girl heart that had been beating for five years, — I recognized hurt in my daddy's eyes. — And I was sitting in the back seat. I'll never forget it. Mother was in the front with daddy and she never said a word. — She never spooned with her, I guess. But I recognized hurt in his eyes. — And so what I did, I lied again and I threw my arms around his neck and I — said, "No, I don't want to go." But I really did. — And then this held me for a while. — This desire to not disappoint my mother and daddy. That held me for a while until I was old enough to fall in love — with Jesus. And then I didn't want to hurt him. — And that's how I got it together. I don't I don't know how but somehow it just worked. — I respected my parents so much and I so wanted them to be pleased and — not disappointed and not hurt that I did things when I was a small child that I knew they wanted me to do. — Well, they call that repression now. You know, you are depriving your child. Now, you must let them think for themselves. — That means that if they want to play in the middle of the freeway, please don't warp their mind by putting them in the fence. — It's stupid, isn't it? Because they were not made to make decisions of some natures when they're still little tiny children. — Now, it's hard for us to remember what peer pressure is really like because, — you know, like like right now, I really want to be friends with you and I really — want you to like me and I'm going to be so nice to you, but there are certain

— things that I do that are just me and I'll do them whether you like me or not. — You know what I'm saying? — a teenager and a child, they're not like that because they don't want to stick out — like a sore thumb. Peer pressure is the greatest pressure really that they live — in. Uh when I was a kid, if you were really cool, you would always go to the bus station and drink Bars root beers. — You know, you didn't have to be a sinner. So you could be a Christian and drink a root beer and you could go to the bus station and be a Christian. So — that was my big vice. I went to the bus station with all the kids and I drank a — root beer and my parents were they really were not aware of how important it was for people — to go to the bus station because they didn't see anything there that was very interesting. just a man hollering out towns that nobody couldn't understand and we weren't going nowhere. — But it was so important that we go because that's the only place there was to go. Man, you got Kendra's growing — now. We're getting a Walmart. We have a Dairy Queen. We got a bunch of stuff there. Since I left, when I left it 22 — years ago, however long ago it was, it went to booming. I think they're up to 2500 now. But I mean, they got all kind — of stuff. But then you had to go to the bus station to drink a Coke or whatever because that's where everybody went. — That was that's not anything like what if it would have been if you didn't smoke a joint. — He was a nobody. — That's what it is now. When I was in the second grade, uh, daddy would take me to school most of the time, but I walked — home in the evening. Oh, it's about a mile and a half. And uh we had to cross a railroad track. And you know how — people that own trains are, they like to block roads to make people mad. Well, they always did. And at school time, — they would always see if they could, you know, get straddle the road there where nobody could pass. — Well, they told me that if I was brave that I would crawl over the train or under the drain. — And I did not want to be a chicken and I know it was a little more dangerous, but it was faster. So I — crawled under the train. My mother didn't know this. — I don't know if she knows it yet. She probably would have never lived to be 70 if she knew I was crawling under freight — trains, but I did. and somebody tattled on me and the teacher uh put me on — detention and she said that I had could not leave school until 4:00 in the afternoon. I guess that meant the track — would be clear and I could walk like a human. — But sometimes we just we you know you notice these kids they they wear blue jeans skirts and blue jeans. And in — other words, it's really cool to look Gumpy, you know, and if you dress up, — this means you are trying to impress people. And the end thing is, I don't care what you think. I don't care what — nobody thinks, man, cuz I'm cool. Well, so they have to all wear this denim. You — see, this is a status symbol. They have to be ugly because if you try to be pretty, you're smart alec. — See, and besides that, you're going to stick out. So, it's so important to them that don't ask me why they chose that. — Why didn't they get something else? But it was just it was just I want to be real cool, so I'll wear blue jeans. I'll — wear uh faded skirts. It's just part of the peer pressure. But what they really — are trying to prove is that they are tough. But they're not tough enough to disappoint each other. — Now, the reason I said this is to say that they are going to be influenced by somebody. — They don't walk alone. They'll be influenced by somebody. — And if I can manage to stay important — to my kids, if my opinion somehow — can be not so horribly outdated, and when I mean I'm not talking about being in conflict with the

— Bible, if somehow I can keep their respect ect. — Maybe my influence will be as important as the peer influence — is on them. Now there are a lot of things that causes a disrespect for — parents. Uh lack of moral integrity like they know whether or not we pay our bills. Uh they know whether or not how faithful we are with a lot of things. — and they're very sensitive to inconsistency. — I would not expect my kids to respect me if I was inconsistent in everything that I did, God's work or or whatever. — Disunityity, parents that are in conflict with each other, and suddenly that just kind of annuls, you know, — whatever influence you were going to have, and unfairness. Now, I'm not an avid fan of the human rights movement, and neither am I the chairman of the — child abuse center. And I do believe in discipline, spankings, whippons, whatever you want to call them, restrictions, probation, — you know, punishment, I don't know, whatever it is. But now, there's this man in our church, and I know he thought — he was really doing something right. He was really going to be a godly parent. and his daughter who's 14. — Uh he wanted her to be so perfect that one day she got up in the supper — table and she didn't wash the dishes immediately. She went to her room first and she said, now she might not have — been, but she said she told me she was planning on coming right back and clean up the kitchen. Well, before she got — back to clean up the kitchen, he had already whipped that belt off like a saber, you know, and he had laid a big — whipping on her and put her on a threemon restriction that she could not be with any of the other kids except when they — were sitting on the benches in church, but she couldn't go anywhere. She couldn't have anybody over, couldn't talk on the phone. And he says to her, — "I'll cure that rebellion in you." Well, what he did was not cure, but create. — Now, they'll always try to make you think you're not fair. But in their heart, they know what's fair and what isn't fair. — And I think that sometimes unfairness makes them lose a certain respect for — us. Parents with u preoccupations outside the home. Sometimes a father is — driven by such a desire to succeed that he has no time to think of anything else. I don't know if it ever occurred — to some dads that the boy might like to have a game of pitch and catch rather than a microwave oven. you know, — sometime they like that better. And a lot of times the mom sometimes I guess it's I don't know maybe they have to work. I I don't really know. — But um sometimes they have just pushed themselves out of their bracket economically — and I feel like that for whatever it's worth to my kids and I don't get to spend as much time as I'd like to and I — spend a lot of time feeling guilty about it. But if I were free to work outside the home in other things besides God's — work, I feel like that my arms and my hands — and my love and my words and my being there to hold — when there was a bruise or a cut. I don't really think that any clothes they ever wore would be equal in value to those things. — Now, you can call me old-fashioned if you want to. And I understand that many people must go out into the world to get — this fantastic fulfillment that they don't know what they're looking for, but whatever it is, I understand all of that and I've heard all that already. — But if you can just be there when they need you, that's how you make friends in a church. Just being there when they're — in trouble. They don't even know how important you are till the bottom falls out of everything and you happen to be there to catch them. Man, that's when — you get to be the hero. See, but they're going to get attention from somebody. — And if I'm not there to give it, they know where to get it. — parental example of resisting authority. Our actions speak louder than our words.

— Sometimes we're not as quick to accept God's rule, — God's word and church, and even civil authority. And we tell them what to do, but we don't do it ourselves. — And I have I don't know if I've been correct in this or not, but I have tried. Brother, you and I have both tried to shield our children from a lot — of things when they were especially younger. — I knew that we didn't have a whole herd of angels in the church, but if it was — somebody that was influencing them for the good, I saw no point at all in — sharing that person's faults with my kids. — I had nothing in the world to gain and I had everything to lose. — I cannot rear children by myself. — No, mom and dad, they don't. They are kidding themselves if they think I reared my children by myself. We are not — because other influences, other ministers, we've had missionaries and preachers in — our home and that's made an indelible mark on our kids. They'll never forget that. In fact, one time I was having a — conference with Ly's principal and he said, "Mrs. Yuing, you must lead a very interesting life." — I said, "Well, I guess I do. I didn't know what he was talking about. — I said, "Well, I guess I do." He said, "Well, Landy acts like that." He just — stops off here on the way back home to see what's going to happen there. That's so exciting. And — he is totally bored with what we've got going on here. — I said, 'Well, so I explained to him a few little things that go on, you know, that I guess they are kind of exciting — and but anyway, don't if you're not a preacher, and if — you are a preacher, don't eat other preachers for breakfast, dinner, and supper when your kids are at the table. — If you are a member of a church, someday you will need that pastor because you will have gone as far as you — can go and you will not have words left and you'll wish to God for somebody that's higher than you are to step in — with a word of authority and just speak the magic word and if he's dead, he can't help. — Be careful before you kill him. — conditional loving. If we only accept a child um you know like just — when they're good wouldn't have very much would we uh I looked at my uh you know like — sometime I was talking while ago about we are striving for perfection and we really are but we have to try to remember that we're dealing with flesh — and blood. I looked at my teenage son one day and it was a moment of correction and somehow I wanted to get across to — him that the correction had not altered my mother's heart. And I said, "Landy, — I don't just love you when you're the star of a gathering. — I don't love you uh when you play the bass or the drums or when you sing or — when you're witty or you look talented or clever. I said, "You look at me, boy." And he did. — I said, "If every friend that you have turned on you — and they turned on their heel and walked away from you, and if you stood alone and had even committed a crime and was — confined to Angola, that's our Huntsville, and you were confined to Angola for life, — you are looking at perhaps the only woman in the world that would hold your — hand through the bars and always call you son. — And he dropped his head and he nodded and barely above a whisper — he said, "I know it, Mom." But conditional loving, — that means that if I'm perfect, you'll approve of me, but if I'm not, you

— won't. In other words, this is just another form of rejection as far as they're concerned. — I tell you what, if God ever gets the hang of the theory, I've had it because I still make mistakes. — And then there is this thing that they call a parent child fusion. — It's um like if you sometimes I think it's caused from a lack of communication. — But um when an unfulfilled parent seeks emotional support from their child, uh this is usually an unconscious thing. — But if it is a persistent thing, it just suffocates the child. They just they can't. In other words, they were not — built to be my leader. I was built to be their leader. And I know I have seen — people that actually they just they were an emotional drain on their children. I have just watched this happen before. — And sometimes these little darlings um they kind of revolt and kind of run away from home and — and then that's kind of the end of it. — Sometimes we send God on errands that really are things in our portfolio. — I know a lot of times I've I've prayed for God to do things and really I guess I could have done them myself. I don't — mean that they'd have been successful, but I could have tackled them. I just thought, well, he can do them better than I can, so I'll just sit over here — and rock and turn it over to him. And I called it faith, but it really wasn't. I was lazy. — I have these very intelligent children. — And uh one night we were sitting in a watch night — service. This thing you have on New Year's Eve, you know where you take the segment wash feet and all that. You might not do that anymore, but we still do it. — And so Vonnie was three, Landy was seven, and Vonnie and I were — sitting together on the front bench. And she just she poked on my arm till I was nuts. She said — I said, "What?" She said, "When are they going to pass them out?" — I said, "After a while, I'm just keeping on patting them hands. I don't even know what she's talking about. I just said — after a while. Could have been an Hbomb, you know. I just said after a while. — So we progressed a little bit the service and she punched on me again. She said when they going to pass them out? I said it won't be long now. — And this went on for the duration of the service. And on the way home that night, — she said, "They never did." I said, "What?" She said, "They never — passed them out." I said, "Passed out what?" She said, "You said that they was going — to pass out." Then she remembered I didn't say it. She said, "I thought, — well, daddy said that we was having a watch night service and — I mean these kids, you know, they were born in Pentecost, you know. So her seven-year-old brother who's much — superior and knowledge, he's very cool. He just kind of lays — back in the back seat and with a real condescending tone and so much pity in his voice, he said, "Poor old stupid — Fonnie." He said, "It's not even watch night, it's wash night. — So I said, "What happened to the center of interest teacher?" — But you know, I I doubt very seriously if the Jews left it up to the Sunday school teacher to explain the Passover.

— There's a lot of things they didn't take any chances with. — There are a few little things that we might can do. — Think of all the things that are really precious and real to you. Make a list in the order of their importance. Take them — one at a time and drill that little inquiring brain until it is firmly planted there. — And then after it has all been put inside their minds, it must slip on down into the heart. — And that's an act of the spirit. The spirit is all that can make this transfer. — And unless somehow this transfer to the heart is made, it will only be head knowledge. — And just remember this that under pressure a brain can be washed. — But if it ever gets down here, if it ever becomes a real part of them — and we try our very best to instill in our kids, if the things that we teach and the — things that we believe, if you can only do those things in our presence, this is — really not a part of your real set of convictions. — But if you can ever come to love it for your own and it can ever slip from the head to the heart and become a part of — them, you stand a pretty good chance. — You know, without a 2x4 or a hammer or a brick or a bucket of paint or whatever, — we have been commissioned to build a house that will withstand the storms of — fear and uncertainty and loneliness and hurt and misunderstanding. — And a house that will be open enough to let any unwanted spirits out and let the — occupants kind of go and come at will, but closed enough to keep out any unwanted spirits and tight enough to let — those who live there feel security when the winds of compromise blow. — To me, this is of utmost importance. — There are things that come up every once in a while that become a controversy. — If my children, every time the wind of compromise blows, — if they have to feel this shaking and rattling of the windows — and this blowing in of the drafty air of compromise, and they're standing there with the storm outside wondering, I — wonder where mom and dad stand on this issue. I wonder what we're going to do. — What course are we going to take? Which way are we going? It's not something that you would want. — But if somehow it has become a settled fact, oh, I don't even have to think — about that. I know mom and dad will do this. And there is a way they can know you that well. Oh, no. That's it. I tell — you what it does. It makes them feel safe and secure. There is a security in boundaries. — You can't play games without them. So why try to live life without them? There — are boundary lines not only that tell me where to stay but where not to be and — not that are just make me feel secure but it tells the difference between me and who's on the other side of it. Let — me keep that house so tight and so secure. I tell you what, you just let them worry about whatever they want to worry about. — Whether it's going to be a they going to get a new car or whether or not they going to have to wear the same shoes the next school. It don't make no — difference. That ain't going to hurt them. That don't kill nobody. But just don't let them worry and wonder about — where you stand on things that really matter. — There are a few things that you will not do if you're a good builder. — You'll not hang the decorative shutters before you put the walls up because you can't.

— And you won't put the coverings for the wall and the expensive carpet down before you have a roof. — You'll not velvet couches or the silk flowers out until there are windows and doors in a house. — The wise builder begins with something — that once the house is built, nobody ever sees it ever again. — It's hidden away in darkness and obscurity forever once the house has been completed. — It's not acclaimed by passerbys. They don't come by and brag on it. Nobody really cares too much about it. They're — not really aware of it until one day the wind blows. — And then that dull gray concrete — that you call your foundation that is buried in the ground. on that — day is the only thing that really does matter. — Nothing else is really important on that day. — Not the couches, not the drapes, not anything else but the foundation. — And a king's palace is no stronger nor greater than its foundation. You — know, the building industry is a shaky one and so many things affect it. Uh you have to work with the economy. You learn — to cope with the climate. You reschedu around the rain or the coal. And a builder's a gambler. He has to be. Uh — there's too many odds against him. You have to learn to work with the climates of different generations. — We do in our building, but the building codes never change. — There's a cheap way to build a house and you can get around a lot of things and put up a lot of shoddy materials and — it's okay till somebody finds out about it. — There's shortcuts that we could take and save time and expense, but the building codes never change. — Somewhere in that drab block of gray cement, there's got to be ingredients that hold the whole thing together. — Have you ever passed by a house and it was all burnt out, — burnt to the ground, and the weeds were all grown up? — I tell you uh when I speak about something like this, I — I want to be very honest with you and to tell you that I have a brother — who is 34 years old — and he was raised in the house that I was raised in. We lived in the same house. — We had the same mother and dad. We went to the same church. — And today he is married to a Catholic girl. — He does not attend church at all. — He can't because he's not tough enough. He'll cry and he'll have to change so he stays away. — My mother told me one time, she said, Joan, there is nowhere to go to escape. — I said, I know, mother. — She said, "I love to come to your house, and I think when I get there, I'll forget, — but I won't be in the rocking chair very long until Ricky is in my face and I see him. — And I know that he's lost." And I never forget it. I know that. — And I believe that. — I believe that. I don't really think there is any way that you can forget. — I don't know what happened. — I don't think there's any psychiatrist that can tell us what happened. I don't think they know. — Same thing that took on me just didn't take on him. — That's what I'm telling you. There's no foolproof way.

— But you know, I I think of a a little woman named Rispa. — It's really not the same thing. But I was just wondering when do you give up? — And I know that I'm talking to people today that you've either got a brother or a son or a daughter — and you just wish to God that you knew that right now they were somewhere — praising God and that everything was all right and they were in his will. And I know you're out there. — And I just wondered when do you give up and when do you quit trying? — You see Risa, they're dead. So why bother? Now — it's hopeless to bring dignity to their lives now. — They're hanging. It's a public spectacle. See, everybody knows now. They know that it's hopeless. — Everybody knows that the embarrassment's been made public. Why don't you go into seclusion now and just try to forget it? — This is damaging to your health, mother. You're weary. — If they had not brought shame to you publicly, it might make some sense. — It's dangerous. The buzzards are coming in the day. They know they're dead. Why don't you know they're dead? — The lines are coming at night. — It's dangerous out here. You can't fight city hall. You know, the world's still after them. Why don't you give up? — Why don't you stop? They're not going to stop. — They're rotting now. Risper, it stinks. Everyone will understand. — They'll know you tried. No one's going to blame you. — All the dignity is gone now. They're just bones in a little rotten flesh. Why — plead for dignity now? When are you going to give up? — I don't know what she said, but I think she said, "Never until I am dead. — I've seen many a kid come back to a burnout. — And there were no flowers there and there was no house standing, just a lot of weeds. — Something in them made them want to go back to memories. And they walked back the old home place and everything was gone. All burned out. Everybody's moved away. — But then when they got there and they picked their way through all of the weeds and the briars and there it was. — There was one thing that the fire didn't get — and that was that big old block of drab gray concrete that had been buried in the ground. — that foundation that somebody had so carefully and painstakingly — laid and it was still there. — And who knows but what it's happened many times that on that very spot — where all of this took place that on that same slab of ground — that they would kneel and rebuild your dreamhouse. — I wish I knew of a way to say that it will never happen. — I do not know of a way to say that it will never happen. — I've just tried to share some things with you today that were just maybe things that we hadn't thought of yet that might just — help correct a course if it had already turned in that direction, but it's not foolproof. — Landy and I were talking the other night on the way to church and we were talking about a little problem and and I said, — "You know, son, um there's not really too much that people can do about some things, is there?" And he said, "No, — there really isn't, mother." I said, "Well, I want to tell you something. I don't have all the answers.

— I don't think it hurts to be honest." I said, "I don't have all the answers and I really don't know everything. I — appreciate your trust in me and your confidence, but I don't know everything." I said, "But I want to tell you about somebody and you know him already. — He's got a pretty good record cuz as long as I've been knowing him, he's never let me down. — And when I take whatever I'm holding as far as a human hand can take it, I don't know of — another thing to do but put it in one that's got scars and just ask him to take it the rest of the way. That's all I know to do. — When I don't have the answers, I know one and he does know. — If I don't know how to answer the question and if somehow my feeble efforts have — not been successful, if I can just take a little young hand and lock it some way with that nail — scarred hand, I think I'll feel a lot safer. — I'm glad I know him because he makes all of our task an awful lot easier. — You've been a beautiful audience. God bless you.