Can You Relate? Part 3

Welcome to Centrepointe. Good to see everybody here, and welcome everybody online. We're so happy you tuned in with us. We are in the middle of a series that's titled simply Can You Relate, and we're going in Matthew chapter 7, and we're talking about how Jesus was kind of laying out how we should have a proper relationship with each other. Now this, for those who have studied scripture, some you know that Matthew five, six, and seven are all a sermon that Jesus is preaching, most famous sermon ever preached. It's the Sermon on the Mount, the best sermon that was ever preached by the best preacher that ever preached, and that is Jesus Christ. But we see here, he's kind of bringing the message down to a conclusion, kind of for that last little, a little bit there. And two weeks ago, as we were talking about this, we, we seen from the very beginning, he talks about being people who are not judgmental. Like he says, judge not. And I even asked, you know, when you leave here tonight, if anybody asked you what's the sermon about, the sermon was about what? Judge nod. Yeah, that's what it was.

Then last week we actually had a handout, and it gave you a little something to take home. And I was kind of getting to go to some of the messages we were coming back. I think some of those rulers are actually putting, they use really good as rods of Correction during service, so that happens. I remember being a little one and having had the rod of Correction applied to certain parts of my backside. You get my attention, right? They'll remember those things. But the point of the rod was simply to remember. It was called the plank. And that's kind of where we were, part number two, talking about that Jesus was saying, it's easy to find fault than other people, but it's hard sometimes a seed in yourself. And in fact, he was using such terminology, is that you can sometimes get so focused on little specs that people have in their eye, and you, you have a plank, and that's the word, it's kind of, kind of coming out of your eyes. He said, won't you focus on the plank you have first? In other words, make sure you're where you need to be before you go critiquing everybody else. That was kind of an apart too. And then here we are in part three, and we're, we're gonna be going tonight is, we're gonna be talking about the pig and the pearl.

Now, hopefully I can make this make sense. We've got a handout, if the guys will help me, and I'm gonna give you a explanation. Let's send out. I wish I could have gave everybody a pearl, so I investigated that, but it was really gonna deplete the building fund to do that, so. And then I was trying to find, you know, maybe some of those little candy things that were out there, and I just didn't work out, so I got you something that I feel like it's gonna be really great. Again, this is all but for you to help remember the sermon. I'm gonna ask for you not to open yours, okay? You keep yours there. If you a preaching, you could open it, but I got a Ring Pop. That nice. So now, parents of little ones, or grandparents of little ones — especially grandparents, the little ones — could you let them get away with stuff? No opening of the Ring Pop, or may the Lord bless you with mosquitos and chiggers, an abundance in your bedroom. So, so give them there. And if you're passing them out to the parents, if mom and dad yelled us to hang on to, if you think your little one can't handle it, then just hang on to it there. But what I want you to do is, later on, as your, as you got this, I want you to just kind of look at it from time to time throughout the week, and kind of remember this message. I'm gonna set mine right there. Hopefully it'll stay, and it will reference this. Now, after I've caused a huge distraction, and people online of like, what is going on right now? No, there's simply handing stuff out. Let's go to Matthew chapter 7 verse number 6.

Now, the entirety of this story that I'm basing this series out of is Matthew chapter 7 verses 1 through 12. So, so far we've covered verses 1 through 5. We're gonna pick up right now in verse number 6, and here's how it goes. This says: Do not give what is holy to the dogs, nor cast your pearls before swine, lest they trample them under their feet, and turn and tear you in pieces. So simply, the pig and the pearl.

Now this passage of Scripture, and as we try our best to unfold this and unpack this tonight — you remember I told you that on week number one, that there are, there are two kinds of people. You remember that? Remember what the people are? Oh, there's two people. There you can control, are two versions of people. There was you. There was you and everybody else, right? Remember that? And then I asked, which one can you control? You. That's right. You can control you. You can't control everybody else, but you can control you. I'm gonna tell you this a little bit step further: that, that sometimes in life, there are pigs. But let me explain this, okay? And, and I'm asking you to use this in that correct context, all right? I don't want everybody leaving here like, I'm gonna call ya, your Pig, your Pig. Please, please keep this in the right perspective, all right? There, there are some people who are pigs. Some people, unlike you and you're over spiritual sensitivity, they don't always live good lives. They don't always make, make the best decisions. They, they tend to do things in a very worldly fashion. They, they can't always appreciate things that are sacred and things that are holy, and, and it's almost like they have a, a spiritual disability. They, they just don't get it. We, we look at it, it's like, we, you, you really ought to respect that, you know. But I don't know if you've noticed this, but there seems to be a complete erosion of sacred things. This is going away. And it's hard for us, and we got to be sure we handle this in the right way. But you, on the other hand, you have pearls, right? You have pearls of wisdom. You have in your possession pearls of good advice. You have pearls of truth, and pearls that can straighten people out. If they would only just receive the pearl you have, their life would be so much better. So you should not waste your time on such people, because they're not worthy. Right, that what we get from this verse of scripture. He's just saying, hey, don't take your worthiness. Don't take your pearls. Don't take your stuff and just throw them down there.

I was reading in the countess's, putting this together, of a Sunday-school class who was asked specifically about this verse of scripture, what they're into rotation of it was. And the one that really made me laugh, and when it says is, was Jacob, was age six. He said, I would never give my sister my toys. Well, is that what Jesus had in mind? Is that your toys are pearls, and your sister's a pig? Is that — I feel like maybe if that's our take, we're probably missing the point of the story, if that's how we take it. But here's what I feel, is that though we kind of Chuck a little bit at a six-year-old who would say such things, I believe that there's 36 and 46 year olds who treat this verse that way. It may not be a toy, and it may not be their sister, but they think about their pearls of wisdom, and I think, I'm not gonna waste my time on somebody who's unworthy. But there's a problem there, because according the Bible, we are all sinful. In fact, the Word of God says, we all like sheep have gone astray. Now, I don't know about you, but all means oh. That means me, and that means you. If you have somebody close to you, just turn — this around I said, it said, that's you. You're a sinner. They don't say it all like, you know, we all are. Every one of us.

Now, if Jesus is the great treasure, right, he's the pearl of heaven, then he should never have been cast in the midst of us, because let's be honest, we're all just messed up people. But is that what happened? No, he came. Right, he came down to where you and I, in the middle of a very messed up world, and he brought himself. The great pearl of heaven came down to where we are, all messed up humanity, all broken, and he came just for you and I. He actually said this in Matthew chapter 2 verse 17 — and I'm gonna be reading for the New Living Translation — when he says this, and y'all give Jeff a little bit of grace here, because I didn't give me any scriptures beforehand, so he may be behind, but I'll stay on point. It says: When Jesus heard this, he told them, healthy people don't need a doctor, six people, sick people do. I have come to call not those who think they are righteous, but those who know that they are sinners. He was coming down to the brokenness. That's what he was drawn to. Something about it, he couldn't help himself. He was just there. He brought himself, the greatest treasure, him, he came.

In another, another spot, in Matthew chapter 5 verse 43 — again, leading, reading from the New Living — it says: You have heard the law that it says, love your neighbor and hate your enemy. But I say, love your enemies. Pray for those who persecute you. In that way, you will be acting as true children of your father in heaven. For he gives his son light to both the evil and the good, and he sends rain on the just and the unjust alike. And that's something — I know sometimes, excuse me, in our humanity, in our reasoning, in our way of thinking, we want to, we want to say to ourselves, I've been really good. I've been going to church, and I've been reading the Bible, and I've been, I've been, been given to causes from Mission. God, I've been, I've been going above and beyond, and in many areas, like I, like I feel like it should. But I see my neighbor over here, and they don't even pay you any attention. And God, I seem to be struggling every day, but you seem to just be reigning blessings down in their life. Well, this verse ought to comfort you, because it says that he reigns on the just and the unjust. Sometimes it doesn't make any sense. You can't rationalize why somebody has something that you don't, when you feel like you're doing the very best you can, when you feel like you've got your pearl and your shining, and you're keeping it bright and glistening for everybody to see, because that's what you feel like you're supposed to be doing. This be very clear: Jesus is not saying here there's certain classes of people are to be viewed as pigs or dogs or unworthy of the pearl that you have. You can't look at it and view it that way. Nobody ever taught or modeled the worth and the dignity of every human being in the way that Jesus Christ did. To him, there were no social classes. There was simply his children that he loved, those that he chose to die for. That's what he did. So if you ever have a moment where you feel year to somebody, that your pearl, your, your great prize there, and you look at some, well, they're not gonna do anything. Why would I want to cast my pearls before the swine? Because they'll just trample — be very careful how you interpret this. The problem with giving a pearl to a pig has nothing to do with whether or not the pig is worthy.

Here's the deal: very few pigs wear pearls. There's a couple, Miss Piggy. For the most part, a pig doesn't have any use for a pearl. See, Jesus was actually getting a whole lot deeper in this. That's usually the way it goes. Jesus is, his expounding on something, he's exposing, he's, he's revealing something that's a whole lot deeper than what you see on the surface. He's talking about relationships. He's talking about some wisdom and some knowledge that can actually save friendships, and, and put together marriages, in your relationship with your children. See, sometimes the pearl you know that you have is so wonderful, and you so desperately badly want to give it to somebody because you know they need the help in their life. But here's the deal: they're not ready to receive the pearl. And if that's the case, you shouldn't try to force it on them.

Someone drop some knowledge on you: there's nothing about a pearl that can nourish a pig. And what a pig needs is nourishment. A pig can't eat the pearl, because it isn't gonna do the pig any good. What the pig needs is food. If you put a bunch of slop in the trough, then you're gonna have a happy and a healthy Pig. But if you give a pig a pearl, you're probably going to end up with a resentful Pig. Matter of fact, you may end up with an ungrateful Pig who's going to look at you and start coming after you, because he can at least eat you. Now I know that seems funny, but go back and look at verse number six. It says: Do not give what is holy to the dogs, nor cast your pearls before the swine, lest they trample them under their feet, and turn and tear you to pieces. Now, some of you in this room have been blessed to have been around hogs. Anybody in the room ever been around hog? It's ok to admit it. Raise it up real proud. Yeah. Pigs, hogs, they have nothing in them that will prevent them from eating whatever they want to eat, if that means it's their brother. My dad tells story: they were moving a house one time, and across a farmer's field, and the pigs got loose and came out, and they were moving this big house, and one of them got hung up under the tire, and it just kind of shredded the pigs back right there. And as soon as the house was out the way, the whole herd of pigs has turned in right there on the pig, started eating. I mean, it was there, buddy. You know, John and Bill, they're running, Bills under the tire. Let's see, Bill — that's what pigs do.

So, having this knowledge, in it's important to understand that if you study the Bible, you always want to keep in mind the larger context of the passage. What is Jesus really telling us? Does it have to do with pigs and pearls? And in Matthew 7, we've been looking week by week, Jesus is talking about wrong ways to have a relationship with religious people and on religious people. He's talking about how we can mess it up, how things are broken. And when it's broken, it prevents people who don't have a relationship from God from ever really coming into a relationship with God, when we judge when we're not supposed to be judging, when were is constantly looking at critiquing these little small, insignificant things in people's lives, when we got a plank hanging out of our face. And now he's talking about pearls and pigs. He warns us about criticizing and blaming. He talks quite a bit about the wrong way people relate to others.

And Jesus is forbidding the practice of what I'm gonna call, for the remainder of this sermon, pearl pushing. Perle pushing. Taking what you feel like is completely right — and it could be completely right — but representing it completely wrong. You see, pearl pushing is when you and I are trying to push our pearls, our wisdom, our wheel, our way, our superior knowledge, onto another person, even when they don't want it, even when it's not being helpful. We keep pushing. That's casting pearls before swine. Jesus, like every good communicator, is trying to pull from things that people can grab ahold of, to make a life lesson, an object lesson, come in to mind, so you can hang on to it. He uses images quite flexibly. Like one time when he described the kingdom of heaven like yeast, because of the amazing growth that was there. But another time he mentions to beware of the yeast of the Pharisees, because it was wrong. See how he's using the taint, same way, but using it at two different angles? Jesus is teaching, and in such a powerful way to me, when I read this, this is some unforgettable humor, when he brings a pearl and a pig. Almost like you got to put in air quotes. There's no castor pearl before the pig. Was there, it's not really the pearl or the pig. It's what those things represent.

Pearl pushers, they drift into the habit of criticizing more than they do encouraging. That's what pearl pushers do. The Apostle Paul says this in Romans chapter 14 verse number 12, reading from the New Living. Says: Yes, each of us will give a personal account to God. So let's stop condemning each other. Decide instead to live in such a way that you will not cause another believer to stumble and fall. Why would you stumble and fall? Because you get busy condemning. Don't you know something? Condemning is not your job. It's not my job. It's not a part of our job description. But we have to be very careful, because some times, and our overzealous attitudes and approaches to people who we feel like, if they would just understand this great pearl of wisdom I'm trying to give it, their life would be so much better — but your approach is so offensive that they block out anything that is there. I personally have spent hours dealing with people who have had pearl pushers put them in a corner, and they built up such a high wall as to let no one in, because of the abuse they took from someone who, no doubt in my mind, had the best of intentions. But because they didn't realize that they were pushing the Pearl, they ended up causing way more damage than any good they could have ever done. You have to understand the relationship and the person that is there.

See, pearl pushers, they take it upon themselves to correct everybody, because they notice that everybody's wrong. This is, this is not a untruthful statement to say that the world is broken. Its broken. It's full of broken people all around, including me and including you. You know, some say there's only two kinds of drivers in the world. You may notice this, right? There's the main, he actually drive way faster than me, and the idiots are too slow. That's meant to be kind of funny, because that's how we view people. Like, how many of us like, I'll come on, just, just go, like, yeah. One of them, one of my favorite quotes from bishops is, when the light would turn green. No, but he says, they're, do they have a color you like? Cuz we do that, right? And then somebody just passes by us, and if they're going ten mile an hour faster than we choose to go — even though we're ten mile an hour over the speed limit — bunch of idiots, maniacs. You want to kill somebody, but not us, right? We're always right in that perfect zone. It amazing how that perfect zone, for some of you, keeps getting slower as the decades go by. Just to salt.

I'm gonna tell you something real important. Don't you listen to this right: if you look for flaws, you will find them every time. If that's what you want, if you're, if you look around, you will find the flaws. I've admitted this. I've self admitted that I have this, and I don't know how to turn it off, that I see flaws in things. I don't know Wow. And I'm not talking about people. I'm just talking about stuff. Like, if I go in the house, if you have a crooked picture in your house, that's all I see when I go in your house. Now, you put it on there, I'm never inviting pastor over. I would never, ever say anything to you about it, but for whatever reason, that's what I see. If you ask me what the picture was about, I couldn't tell you. I will just tell you is crooked. Things just, they always have jumped out to me like that. I have some kindred spirits, I know. Virgina, slow now. Where's Regina? Yeah, we've talked about. She's kind of same way. We're going on, I can't handle. It's gotta — and probably, if you turn your back, off, straighten it, because it makes my experience better.

But let's get down to human beings. Let's get down to what he's talking about in Matthew chapter 7, and that's relationships. If you look for flaws and relationships, you'll find them every time. Do you know why? All right, this is profound. This is, this is, this is tweetable. This is noteworthy. You ready? Hang it on: there are no perfect people. That includes you and me. There was only ever one perfect one, and he died for the rest of us. Okay. Now, if you'll get that, and really get it down deep inside, life gets better. It really does. Because then, when that imperfect person who you're trying to shove a pearl down their throat, you can tell yourself in that moment, you know what, there's no perfect people. Now, we all are trying to live the very best life we can, and this sermon is not about how we make excuses for some of the stuff we do, because we just say, well, that's just how I am. There needs to be a whole sermon preached on that, because wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, liar, liar, pants on fire. You can change. But we're not perfect people. If you search for faults, you'll be successful. If you search for faults all the time, there might be a reason why nobody hangs out around you, because nobody likes being around someone who's constantly pointing out their faults. Parol pushing is a very lonely way to live, because pearl pushers tend to adopt a tone of superiority. Guess what, the pig generally notices this. Pigs have a pretty sense of right. Are, have you ever noticed, when somebody was critiquing you, how many of you liked it? You know, it's like when you go to the doctor, they want you get on the scale. Why, the kill me. Let's talk about your BMI. Why? I mean, I know I can grab a spare tire over here. I mean, I know it Wiggles around. I wish it didn't. It does. We don't like that. We like going on the microscope. And that's something, any, crazy how so captivated we are with numbers. Fiona's, make somebody happy, just adjust the scale the wrong way. Just turn it down. They get through, I'm 15 pounds lighter. They're great. They feel great about themselves. They're just Gipping around. You can do nothing. You just moved the button a little bit. Part of love is knowing not just what to say. It's knowing when to say it. Or May importantly, more importantly, knowing it's important to just not say it.

From the book of Proverbs 27 verse 14, reading from the New King James: He who blesses his friend with a loud voice, rising early in the morning, it'll be counted accursed to him. Why? Because pigs like sleep. That was funny, man. Y'all just like tough tonight.

Now your pearl, your great wisdom, that pearl may be about Jesus Christ himself. But think about like this. Let's say that there's a lady. She's married. Her desires for husband to be in church — that's a good thing. She tells him her desire. She tells him that she is praying for him. That's a good thing. She has a spiritual pearl that she wants to give him. But she keeps trying to port, force the pearl upon him. She gives him books and says, read this. And she, she tells him, here's a godly podcaster, here's five proofs that God exists. When it comes prayer time at the meal, see, she prays out loud for God to deliver her husband, until the food gets cold. He keep going at it like that. That's not what the scripture says. The Bible talks about living in such a way, with quiet contentment, that the witness you live before them will actually draw them in. Do you catch that? It's not about shoving it down their throat. It's about living in the beauty of holiness, in such a way that people are attracted, even if they don't understand. They're drawn in. What are they drawn to? They're drawn to the beauty that you and I reflect of him. That's what we're about, is to be a reflection of God.

And when it comes to telling other people about your faith, one of the most important tips you can follow is obeying the law of supply and demand. In other words, monitor what level of demand for spiritual conversation is coming out from the other person. Because if they're there, they're engaged with you, their heads nodding, and they're going on, they're asking questions, and by all means keep going. But if they start getting quiet, and they got their arms folded, and they're starting to drift off and look at other places, maybe, just maybe you've overloaded them for a minute. It doesn't mean that what you're talking about is bad. You may be delivering some great scriptural truth and knowledge that's very important. Are you saying, Pastor Kevin, that I shouldn't be witness? That's not what I'm saying at all. Please don't misunderstand me. But know the subject matter you're talking with. Understand the supply and demand. If there is a demand, then obviously you keep the supply going. But if it cuts off, know when to stop. Give them enough for them to feed on, and want to come back again for more.

Pearl pushing can happen in a marriage. It can happen in a workplace. It can happen between friends. It can happen in church. Some of you delight in telling the new converts how they need to immediately change every aspect of their lives in order to be right with God. And you're wrong. Leave that instruction to the life, to the pastor. How about you just try loving and encouraging? Amen. Our students came out Monday night, and I am so proud of them. I had a — please understand what I'm saying — I had a weed pulling party. He's some explanation: we pulled the weeds out of the mulch bed around the church, and they showed up. I think there was 26 of them. They came, and I fed them pizza, and, and man, they did such a great job. So, so proud of them.

Now, bring this up for reason, because one of the places I feel like pearl pushing really gets in trouble is when it comes to the relationship between parents and children. Parental pearl pushing is a major source of alienation and families. And I hope you know my heart. I remember when our girls were born, I was just overwhelmed with love and joy and happiness, and, and all that it brought on with, with each one of them. But it was also this overwhelming sense, in this obligation that came along, that I needed to be sure that I'm pointing them towards Jesus, then I can answer their questions for them. That, that they would, that we, Chassis and I, are living in such a way that our girls can see this lived out, and, and, and it be something that is, is beautiful, and they're drawn into. And trying to bounce it all out, and — but you know, it comes with a lot of just stress, are nice to say. I mean, we're all ready when they're little. You're kind of controlling all these parts of their life. You're controlling what they eat, and when they sleep, and what they wear, and where they went, and what they saw, on who they heard, and all this stuff, you know. And the first ones mourn, you don't, anybody touch it. Nobody sneezes. You sterilize everything that's ever come in contact with them. The second time you have a child, you know, you live at least. But I'm, the third one comes, only like, whatever it is, picking up out of the dirt and eat it. Just keep them quiet. That's all I need. That's neat. Quiet, whatever makes them happy. But you live with all this, and you're in control. And, and you think yourself, you know, you can mess, you can mess it up. And now know about you, but there was one point, if I manage, there's some heavy stuff, like, I can really mess them up. I don't want to be messed up. And the only thing harder than being in control your child's life is not being in control of your child's life. There's so much stress there, and we live with pressure and expectations and worries and hope and love, and it's all mixed up and jumbled together. It's great, have kids. We're trying their best to do all we can. You know, we're constantly telling them, and then before you know it, these little truths you're trying to get in their life, you're trying your best to balance it out. And you're telling stuff like, set up straight, and clean your room, and do your homework, is your homework done? What are you doing this? What are you thinking? Why in the world would you do that? Don't touch that. Don't cut that on, cut that off. Why's the door open? Why's the refrigerator open? Why are you outside? Where's your clothes? Where's your shoes? Where are you? It's just a constant in your life. And there's times you're like, why did I do this? They even asked my wife one time, I was like, why do we have kids? Why do we do this? We have to be careful, because we put this pressure on them, like, did you get this done, and that's not right. And your model nuclear reactor is never gonna be the way it needs to be. I better help you get it put together, so that you get a name. You got to earn all this, and why aren't you more like, and why can't you, why won't you, and why do you disappoint me? And you may never say these questions out loud, but the pigs are sensitive. They know. They pick up.

I mean — have you asked you a question: how many of you really wish your parents had given you more lectures when you're growing up? Yeah, it's funny, innit, right? Cuz you can probably still remember some of them. You're just like, any other few times, you're like, just, just whip me. Let's don't talk. Just whoop. Because whoop eventually gets over. The pain will fade after a while. Just, just beat me down. Don't talk. We didn't do that, though. We're doing it. With a known of us want more lectures. I wish I would have gotten one more. No, we never say that.

Here's the deal: so many times, my kids — no, I don't want, before I tell them — hey, no, there's even times I look at my mic: do you know? I know, not the point. Jesus is teaching here on the Pearl. The pig is not, don't confront — okay, y'all still with me? It's not about don't confront. It's not about don't set boundaries, or don't enforce consequences. You know, we all need that. Parents need to do those things. It's important. Kids need boundaries. A lot of the trouble we're dealing with right now in the world as a whole was because there was no boundary set. I need it. But Jesus point is, don't force your wisdom on a non receptive person. You have to balance it out. You can't control any other human being. We talked about it last couple of weeks. They have their own little kingdom, just like you have your own little kingdom. And you cannot make sure that every human being turns right. You have to do your best. You have to ask for godly wisdom. If your parenting right now, you better be praying. I mean, you better be seriously praying every day, and asking God for wisdom and guidance and ability to understand what it is that you can help do to those little ones that he has blessed you with in your life, because you need it. And there stage of life that we've experienced so far, we're still needed. And the way things are going, I'm sure it never goes away. You need it. But it's not your kingdom. You have to learn to let a few things go. Why? Because if you do, you make space for God. You make space for him. God is the only one who can enter into their little kingdom at very deep levels and make changes. He can change the hearts of kings. You think he can't change the heart of your kid? He loves them more than you loved them. But do you believe that? Do you live in such a way?

And for those of us who love and who followed Jesus, and, and I know we want more than anything else in this world, for our children to have a relationship of God. We want it. We want it so desperately bad, for them to have a strong relationship. Well, they're always being led by his spirit. And we desire that. And I know there's maybe nothing more painful to a parent than to know that their greatest treasure of their life could be unwanted by their children. So you tried your best to, to give them this pearl, this beautiful thing that was there, and they seemingly took it and just threw it away. God made everybody to be free to choose. That includes you, and that includes your kids. God loves people, even when they choose to use their god-given freedom to reject him. He still loves them. He makes the Sun to shine, and he causes the rain to fall on the just and the unjust, those who love him, and those who spit in his face, he still loves. Now, this is why, in a spiritually flourishing church, everybody — not just the parents, but everybody — owns the, the part in helping our children grow. Our students, it's, it's our responsibility. That's why it's important to be plugging. That's why it's important, do you encourage your children and your kids and your students to be a part of what's going on? Why? Because there's strength in numbers. That's why it's important for you to come to church with your family. So that when my families want to struggle, they show up, there's other examples. There's other people that I can say, see, they're going to church. It's important that we worship, and that we love God, that you got your hands raised, that you're engaging what's going on, that you're participating, that you're showing up. Why? Because it's all setting examples. We all have an obligation to this. We're all family, and we all have a part to play. None of us are exempt from the other. We all have an obligation, and we all celebrate the wins, and we mourn the losses. See, when it's done right, when it's the way it's supposed to be, when great things happen to you, and great things happen to your family and your children, we celebrate with you. And when things are not going the way, and maybe your child is taking the Pearl and thrown it away, we come around you and love you, and we pray, and we pray hard, because it's our child too. Maybe we didn't birth them. Maybe we didn't spend the time raise them. But there's a bond. There's a connection, because they were part of us. That's why it's important. That's why you have an obligation.

Just want to say is pastor, I'm so grateful for every single one of you, every person who volunteers your time and your energy and pours your heart to love our kids and to love our students. Thank you. Thank you for what you do. Thank you for those that have volunteered tirelessly over the years in kids clubs and Wednesday nights and in children's church and in Sunday school. Thank you. I know, I know sometimes you just want to pull your ears right off your head. I know. But you have no idea the impact you have making in eternity, because you're taking a little time to spend with them. I know, I've said this before, but it's been a while since I said this: I'm a product of our children's department. Me, your pastor, me — I was raised in this sunny school. So you have no idea what you're doing. No idea the impact. No idea the eternal impact you can make by just giving a little one some attention. I can't tell you how many numbers of families and individuals who are a part of our church because of our wonderful children in a student's department. They choose to come here. Why? Because people know the importance.

Does it bring this towards the end? There's a story that I want to talk about when it comes to having a critical eye. So I'm gonna tell you a story, then there's a story behind the story. You like this? The story I've actually told before. It's been a number of years ago, but I didn't tell the backstory behind it. The story goes, it's about a fifth grade teacher — this, this is the fictional part that I'll give you, this story that was the reason why the fiction was written. The stories about a fifth grade teacher named is Thompson, and she had a boy in her class that was just tough. His name was Teddy Stallard. And Oh, Teddy didn't play well with the other kids, and he was just always kind of a mass. He didn't smell the best. His hair was always just a shovel. There's just, kind of dirty, and he just really, just to be honest, he was unpleasant, very disruptive in the class, and wasn't a joy to be around. And it got to the point that where she kind of took the light, and putting a lot of red ink on his papers that he turned in, just like she was able to kind of work her frustration back out by critiquing all his homework. Now, that went on about halfway through the year, until she kind of got more of Teddys story. Because here's the deal: everybody has a story. Teddy's first grade teacher wrote in his file, his permanent record, that Teddy's a bright child and ready to laugh. He's a joy to be around. The second grade teacher wrote this: Teddy's an excellent student, well-liked by his classmates, but he is trouble, because his others very ill. Life and home must be a struggle. His third-grade teacher wrote, Teddy's mother's death has been really hard on him. He tries to do his best, but his father's not very engaged and shows no interest. Teddy's fourth grade teacher wrote, Teddy is with groan, does not show much interest in school. By now, Mr. Thompson realized the problem. She was very ashamed of herself, very upset about how she had treated Teddy. She felt even worse when her students brought her Christmas presents, trapped in beautiful ribbons and bright shiny paper, and Teddy brought in her gift. It was clumsily wrapped up in a brown grocery store bag. Teddy brought her present, she ripped open the grocery bag. Mr. Thompson was quite careful to open it in the middle of all the other presents. Some of the children started to laugh when she pulled out an old rhinestone bracelet and a half fuse bottle of perfume. Now she stifled the children's laughter, and she exclaimed how pretty the bracelet was, and she dabs some of the perfume on her wrist. Teddy stayed after class that day, and went up to Miss Thompson, and he said to her, you smell just like my mom used to. In that bracelet looks really pretty on your wrist. After the kids laughed, she cried. She realized how wrong she had been. He wasn't a bad kid. He was just living in a difficult set of circumstances. He needed somebody to understand him. So she decided to change. She began to encourage him. She began to believe in him. She began to spend extra time on him. And every time she did, the faster he responded. And by the end of the year, Teddy had become one of the smartest kids in class.

Six years later, she got a note from Teddy. He wrote that he had finished high school, second in his class. Four years after that, she got another letter, saying while things have been tough, he's seen, graduated from college with highest honors. Four years later, another letter came. This time it was signed Theodore F Stallard MD. He also wrote that he had met a girl, and told her that he was married, and asked if she would come and sit in the place where his mom would have been. She did. She wore the bracelet in the perfume he gave her. And when he thanked her for being the best teacher he ever had, she said, you had it all wrong. You were the best student I've ever known.

Now, that's a fictional story, and it makes me cry. That story was written by a woman named Elizabeth Ballard. She said it was triggered by two life events. She had been teaching in Sunday school. There was a grubby little boy that had given her a rhinestone bracelet and a bottle of cheap perfume. That moment reminded her that when she was a little girl, she grew up and her family was quite impoverished too, very poor. She had no money, and she brought her teacher a gift of pecans from the tree in their yard. And when the teacher opened it up in front of the other students, the students laughed at the gift, but the teacher quickly quieted them down, and told everybody that she was gonna be making a fruit cake, and this was exactly what she needed. Now, let's be honest, nobody makes fruitcakes. Fruitcakes, your accidents like sinkholes. But the teacher knew. The teacher knew there was much more there.

So I think the reason this story touches so many people's — because we forget that every day we choose the eyes. We choose either eyes of judgment, our eyes, our love, when we look at people. Because everybody has a story. Everybody does. I don't know about you, but I think the world is kind of tired of people, in the name of Christianity, trying to force pearls on people. Say, I feel like the real question is: if you're not supposed to relate to people by judging or condemning, and if you're not allowed to force advice on them, if you're not supposed to do relationship by criticism, then how are you supposed to relate to people? What are you supposed to do if you're concerned about the fact that they're not living the way they're supposed to be, and thing are going away? Hey, whoa, hey, ey, see, Jesus, I feel like, exemplified at best. He just had this way about him, the way he can use words, and how he could talk. It was just unlike any of anybody else. Jesus, he, he came out and he simply said, and it was almost crazy, he, he related to people because his basic operating system for relationships was so powerful. And next Wednesday night I'm gonna explain, but for now, but for now: no judging, no condemning. And when you look at this this week, I just want you to remember Teddy's story. Why? Because everybody has a story. Everybody has a story. More often than not, the very thing you're wishing they didn't have, there's probably a good reason behind why it's there. Maybe, just maybe, you learned how to pray in such a way that you asked God to give you eyes of compassion. What if tomorrow morning, or whenever your prayer time is — because I hope you have a daily prayer time, but whenever that daily prayer time is — you simply ask God today, give me eyes to see like you? Yes, they don't see fault and people, but I see, if out you, that I can look beyond what my human instinct says, but I can allow your spirit that's in me to guide me and see. And more important than me giving them the pearl is me showing them love.

Will you stand? Jesus, I love you, and I thank you again for the truth that is in your scriptures, that reveals your personality to us. God, I know that there are Teddy's all around us. There are individuals who have stories, who have experienced things, who have gone through circumstances that I probably would never understand in my life. And it would be so easy for me to try to force things on them, but God, I realize the best thing I could do is learn to laugh, learn to allow your light to shine through me, to be the right amount of light and the right amount of salt, that people could see you in me. And God, also be sensitive that when the door does open, that I can give them the truth, that you died for them, so that they could have life eternal. Give us the ability to see, and they trust you every day. In Jesus name we pray, amen. Next week we're going to spend some time talking about the ask. You're just missed in Jesus name.